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READER ALERT: For all the latest wrestling happenings, check out our News & Rumours section.
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By NICK TYLWALK Special to SLAM! Sports
A weekly SLAM! Wrestling Editorial Column
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Quick hits
Down the Ramp
By NICK TYLWALK --
For SLAM! Wrestling
Every columnist should have the right to monkey with
the format of his or her column every once in a while,
so I'm going with some quick hits on a number of
different topics this week. I sincerely hope this
doesn't confuse any of my regular readers. Thanks go
out to all three of you, by the way. Here come the
Quick Hits:
From the "That Didn't Take Long" department,
separate storylines on Raw and Smackdown seem to have
lasted less than a month. Here's a little unsolicited
advice for the WWF writers: if you wanted to have a
feud between Undertaker and Triple H, why not just put
Helmsley on Raw after he lost the title? I mean, I
understand that he "took the place" of Hulk Hogan on
Smackdown, but little details like logic never gummed
up the works in the past. The events of this week's
shows almost guarantee that The Game and the Dead Man
will keep making guest appearances on each other's
shows, pretty much negating the whole concept of the
brand extension. This is making my head hurt.
I'm all for the Hulkamania revival. In fact, I
dedicated a whole column to it a few weeks ago. The
fact remains, though, that the Hulkster is pushing my
power to suspend disbelief to its very limits. Take
last night's Smackdown for example. Seeing Undertaker
get "knocked over" the top rope and then the guardrail
by Hogan was hard to swallow. To quote the Sports
Guy, not good times. Bad times.
I haven't been watching Tough Enough 2 religiously,
so maybe this isn't fair for me to say, but I'm not
feeling any of the contestants right now. After some
discussion with my roommates, I'd say you have to
watch out for Kenny as a dark horse. He's been pretty
low key, just laying in the cut and hanging around.
To this point the best part of this season has been
the inclusion of a cast member with a spoiler on his
head, though I did enjoy the visit by Maven in last
night's episode. Oh yeah, and I'm not volunteering to
take any chops from Bob Holly. Ever.
Thanks to all of you who e-mailed me on my column
about the possibility of The Rock leaving for a
full-time gig in Hollywood, even though many of you
disagreed with me. Several people brought up the
obvious parallels with Hogan when he first dabbled in
movies, but there's really no comparison. Rocky has
so much more charisma on the screen than Hogan that
it's not even funny. Maybe The Scorpion King isn't
the role that will propel him to superduperstardom,
but I'm going to stick to my guns and say that he'll
be gone from WWF rings by the end of 2003.
The cynics have won me over on the "Brock Lesnar as
the WWF's Goldberg" argument. It's still early but
the ingredients are all there: guy with a big hulking
phsyique and some impressive power moves, doesn't
talk, short matches, runs through a bunch of people
without tasting defeat but conveniently steers clear
of the top echelon stars while doing so. All we need
now is the announcers talking about his undefeated
streak and we'll be right back in 1998. Aside from
the obvious lack of creativity, this is doing a bit of
a disservice to Lesnar since, as a former NCAA
wrestling champion, he has actual wrestling skills.
And speaking of things that make me think back to
the time when I did Nitro reports for this site, I was
bummed when Big Show joined the nWo. The one positive
is that it was consistent with the way Show gets used
by the WWF writers. He's a stopgap solution for any
storyline or TV show that has a hole. Need a credible
(fairly credible anyway) heavy hitter as a mystery
opponent? Cue up Show's music. Does Vince need to
teach a mouthy face a lesson? There's that Big Show
guy again. Like I've said before, he's the designated
hitter of the WWF, sort of a 500-pound, seven-foot
Edgar Martinez.
Finally, it's hard to write anything right now
without thinking of the staff cuts at Slam! Though
I've never met my editors in person, I've been
contributing to Slam! Wrestling since 1998 and feel
like I know them. It was tough to read John
Molinaro's farwell column earlier this week, though I
know with his talent he will land on his feet. The
future of this site is definitely up in the air, but
it's hard to feel bad about losing what to me is a
hobby when others are losing their full time jobs. In
case I don't get another chance, I'd like to publicly
thank John Powell, Greg Oliver and Molinaro for the
opportunities they've given me. Thanks guys.
I don't want to end Quick Hits on a down note. JP
hasn't sent me an e-mail to say it's over yet, so I'll
talk to all of you again next week.
Previous Columns
April 19 ... Goodbye to Rocky
April 5 ... Boarding the Hulkamania bandwagon
March 29 ... WWF split finally here
March 22 ... WWF should just relax
March 15 ... WrestleMania, slamdunk or air ball?
March 1 ... WWF return a test for Hall
Feb. 22 ... WWF return a test for Hall
Feb. 15 ... Nick who?
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