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  February 6, 1999



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Chill out, ol' buddy
By BRET HART -- Calgary Sun
  Touchy, touchy.

 What is it with some people lately? Is it just something in the air? A full moon maybe?

 Take Ric Flair for example. I mean, with Hollywood Hogan and Chuck Zito following Flair's son, David, around, Flair is stressed out.

 Maybe that's understandable. But I don't see why Flair assumes that Hollywood would do something so lousy as to stalk his kid? I'm sure there's a much more civilized explanation for it.

 It's easy to understand how the usually-unbendable Flair is folding a little under the pressure of this David thing. That must be it. That better be it. Otherwise I would have no choice but to take it personally and get really mad when Flair got on Nitro and accused me, in front of the whole world, of being a big phony.

 Where did he get this lame idea that I made up a groin injury so that I could have a lighter schedule, "... like Hulk Hogan."

 He said that, I didn't.

 I feel bad for Flair at the way he embarrassed himself by even insinuating that I, the most dependable guy in wrestling, would stoop so low. I'm asking you all to please not hold what Flair said against him. I want you to know I've blown it off, not out of disrespect, but because I do respect Flair and I appreciate the stress he's under.

 Consider it forgotten.

 How about that slick move by Scott Hall, convincing Flair that the nWo should have a shot at my WCW U.S. Heavyweight title.

 Flair gave Hall a deciding match with Benoit without taking into account that I'm still the nWo's head recruiter! Even though I'm not a card carrying member, my affiliation with the nWo is clear. Just look at the WCW T-shirts that I'm on and you'll see the nWo logo, clear as day. That's because Hollywood appreciates my support as much as I appreciate his understanding of why I have to remain a lone wolf. This is a perfect example of how our arrangement is mutually beneficial. No matter who wins the U.S. title match at Superbrawl, the nWo still wins.

 As for Chris Benoit, I'll give him a title shot any time he wants. It's too bad he got caught in the nWo's smooth move to keep the belt in the family but at least I hope he can see the humour in it.

 Which is more than I can say for Will Sosso, you know that fat -- er, horizontally challenged -- guy from Mad TV.

 Fans tell me he was on The Gabreau Show calling me a big bully because I put him in the Sharpshooter when I taped my second guest shot on Mad TV.

 Yeah, I did put him in the Sharpshooter. But what's the big deal?

 Let me set the record straight. If for some reason I'd wanted to actually hurt a fellow Canadian like Sasso, do you think he'd be feeling well enough to do TV talk shows?

 I was just joking around with him. One of the big shot production people told me to do it. What's the matter Will, you can dish it out but you can't take a joke? You can check it out on Mad TV -- tonight.

 Congrats to coach Dean Clark and the Calgary Hitmen for clinching first place in their division. It would be fun if you all come out and cheer the Hitmen on against the Regina Pats tomorrow.

 See you there or be square!

 To my buddy Chad ... it's not goodbye, it's see ya later.

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