I won't run for PM yet
By BRET "THE HITMAN" HART -- For the Calgary Sun
Congratulations to the Stampeders for one of the best Grey Cup games
ever. Being a huge fan of the CFL, it amazes me that they don't get more
support. I remember a time when people in the States thought guys like myself,
Davey Boy Smith, Dynamite Kid, and Jim (The Anvil) Neidhart would never make
it in the big time because we were just from some little promotion.
That's what they said about Doug Flutie when he got to the Buffalo Bills
without realizing that kind of talk only makes him kick better butt. You can't
stop talent.
The Stamps are saying that Edmonton was the City of Champions, but now
Calgary is. I try to do my part to earn our city that distinction as have the
Calgary Hitmen, 1997-98 Central Division champs. Congratulations to Kelly
Kisio and Dean Clark for being chosen by the WHL to be coach and general
manager, respectively, of the Eastern Conference team for the WHL all-star
game in Lethbridge on Jan. 20.
The huge news in wrestling this week is that Hulk Hogan announced that he's
hanging up his boots. I've always respected what Hulk has done for the
wrestling business. He was the single greatest main event media magnet who
spurred the wrestling boom of the '80s. In the '90s, he adapted to the
requisite rougher edge and made the difficult evolution of his character look
easy by becoming head of the nWo, which, not surprisingly, turned out to be
one of the greatest wrestling stories of the decade. I can understand that
Hogan wants to move on, but why move out?
Rather than severing ties with the business that made him as much as he
made it, I'd prefer to see Hogan remain in some capacity, maybe as a goodwill
ambassador. Also, the value of his input behind the scenes is incalculable.
Unfortunately for wrestling, Hogan has bigger things on his mind. Hulk Hogan
wants to run for President of the United States.
Some of you have written that this is the worst case of over-inflated ego
ever. I don't think so. Don't ever under-estimate Hulk Hogan. He's
accomplished a lot of things that people thought were impossible. If Jesse
Ventura can be governor of Minnesota, then Hulk Hogan can be president.
A lot of you have been quick to point out in your mail that Ventura worked
his way up the political ladder, from Navy SEAL, to mayor, to governor -- and
it wasn't his wrestling persona that got him elected. I've always known Jesse
Ventura to be an intelligent, articulate guy and I believe he'll make a great
governor. I'm not sure if you'll be relieved or disappointed to know that I
have no plans to be prime minister.
It seems like any chance of a reconciliation between Scott Hall and Kevin
Nash has been thrown out the window?
Nash earned the coveted shot at Goldberg by winning World War Three with
the final combatants coming down to himself, Hall and Lex Luger. The Wolfpac
members agreed to fight for the title shot; Luger attempted a Torture Rack on
Hall and Nash eliminated them both. Nash and Goldberg will have their
monumental matchup for the World Heavyweight Title at Starrcade.
Have you noticed that wrestling has a sign language all its own, both in
the ring and in the stands? Hand signs and painted signs that display symbols
and sayings that only club wrestling can understand. Until now.
The Diamond Cutter has been showing up in some unlikely places.
Herschel Walker flashed it after scoring a touchdown last season. Hall of
Fame-bound bowling champion Pete Weber flashed it at the PBA National
Tournament. Todd Dusosky of the National Professional Soccer League champion
Milwaukee Wave celebrated a goal with it this season. Has Dallas Page started
a trend destined to take its place alongside mainstays like raisin' the roof
and the wave? No.
I overheard DDP, the other day, explaining to a reporter, "It's the
universal symbol for excellence and everybody is doing it, from old ladies to
little kids." Dallas Page is a fairly salty fighter. He's quick and he's
agile, but he's sneaky, too. Did you see the cheap way he stole the U.S. Title
from me after I won it back on Sunday? It's obvious to anyone who saw the
match that he put the Diamond Cutter on me long after I'd won. The match was
over.
Then there's that puny, sniveling Dean Malenko. He took advantage of a
groin injury he knew I already had. Watching from home, it didn't look like
much but that puny, pathetic little worm ripped up my entire groin so bad that
I've barely been able to walk. Next time I fight him, I'll rip him in two so
he'll have to fight midgets.
Despite warnings from my doctors, I'll be there to wrestle Page on Monday
because I want the U.S. Heavyweight title back. I find it amusing that the
Americans can't stand it when a Canadian has the U.S. title!
I'm going to be on Dateline this Tuesday and I don't think you want to miss
this show because it looks like it's going to be very interesting.
You can write to Bret c/o The Sun or
e-mail him at HITMANclub@AOL.com.
I couldn't take this grievance to J.J. Dillion because Eric Bischoff fired
him and it was very strange that I couldn't get any information from the WCW
front office on who's taken over Dillion's job. Doesn't it seem strange to you
that they fired the head honcho of the executive committee on live TV but they
dropped it right there and made a point of not letting anyone know who's in
charge now? It seems like a coverup worthy of the X-Files. Whoever it is, he's
already shown more fairness than Dillion ever did by setting up a rematch
between me and Page for the United States Heavyweight Title on Nitro. Now that
I've found out how crafty Page is, there's no way I'll let him get away with
any more cheapshots.
