CANOE Network SLAM!Sports

 
SLAM! Sports SLAM! Wrestling
  Sat, March 1, 2003



News & Rumours
Bios
Obits
Canadian Hall of Fame
WrestleMania 30
WrestleMania 30 photos
Video
Movie Database
Minority Mat Report
Columnists
Features
Results Archive
PPV Reviews
SLAM! Wrestling store
On Facebook
On Twitter
Send Feedback




Photo Galleries

WWE Survivor Series


House of Hardcore VII


Signmania VIII


Beulah McGillicutty


Big Event 7 fan fest


Raw in Buffalo


SHIMMER tapings







SCOREBOARD
PHOTO GALLERY
VIDEO GALLERY
COMMENT




READER ALERT: For all the latest wrestling happenings, check out our News & Rumours section.

NOTE: SLAM! Sports has the exclusive rights to publish this column on the Internet. You may link to this column, but a copy cannot exist on any other Web site. It also CANNOT be posted on newsgroups or newsboards.
Feel free to use the this button on your site to link to Bret's column.
Link to:
http://www.canoe.ca/SlamWrestling/hitman_home.html.
Check out our Bret Hart photo gallery!.

Perfect prankster



By BRET HART -- For SLAM! Wrestling

  On my website, I asked everybody to vote on what topics they most enjoy me writing about. Interestingly enough, the most popular category is when I tell personal stories about wrestlers.

So here goes ...

I remember flying to Tokyo for a huge WWF card at the Egg Dome.

It was a packed flight with a crew of huge wrestlers taking up all the seats in business class.

After clearing our way through customs and immigration, all the wrestlers were herded onto a little bus for the hour-and-a-half ride to Tokyo through nothing but bumper-to-bumper traffic and exhaust fumes.

When Curt Hennig and I were getting on the bus, there were only two seats left -- one at the very front and a fold-out seat for one at the very back.

Hennig and I talked at the top of the bus steps, asking the driver what in the world we were waiting for.

The driver didn't speak English and explained as best he could that one more wrestler was coming.

Suddenly, the sliding doors of the airport parted and out lumbered the extremely inebriated and lathered in sweat Andre the Giant!

Curt and I locked eyes realizing the front seat was always Andre's.

Talk about a Royal Rumble.

Curt and I simultaneously raced for that last seat in the back ... crawling and fighting, pulling each other back, as the other wrestlers cheered and egged us on.

I guess that's why they used to call him Mr. Perfect ... because, by hook or crook, he got there first.

The only possible seat left for me was a 6-in. space next to Andre, who was just coming up the steps of the bus.

I'll never forget the big, mischievous grin on Hennig's face as I slid in beside the Giant!

By the time I got off the bus I was car sick and soaked in sweat -- meanwhile, Curt was reclining back listening to his Walkman, laughing to himself the whole way.

On a flight home from Japan, some years later, Curt took his seat up in first class and casually offered Yokozuna a chunk of his chocolate bar.

Perhaps not surprisingly, Yoko always had a sweet tooth and pestered Curt for more and more chocolate.

Little did Yokozuna know Curt was feeding him chocolate laxative.

Three quarters of the way through the flight, Yoko practically offset the balance of the plane when he leapt up and frantically pleaded for emergency assistance from the petite Japanese stewardesses.

Yoko, unfortunately, was well over 600 lb. at this time and couldn't get into the little airplane toilet. So, much to the horror of the travellers in coach class, Yoko was escorted to the back of the plane ... where newspaper was placed on the floor and these brave, courageous stewardesses held up blankets to block the scene from the view of the passengers.

It was a turbulence they'd never seen the likes of before -- and I dare to say since!

Some of the craziest stories about wrestlers and the wrestling business have nothing to do with wrestling. Some of the most bizarre memories I have were in airports, airplanes and buses. That's where you'll find all the little nuggets.

So, there you are, a couple of short stories about one of the craftiest pranksters there ever was in wrestling, Mr. Perfect.

More on Bret Hart




Know someone who might be interested in this page? Just type in their e-mail address to send them the URL.

Destination email address:


Your email address: