April 13, 1998
3 Ninjas good for a few laughs
By BOB THOMPSON - Toronto Sun
Now that's funny. Not ha-ha funny or ho-ho funny, but funny as in "ya gotta be kidding" funny.
That would be Hulk Hogan in a hairpiece. You get to witness this odd occurrence in Sean McNamara's 3 Ninjas: High Noon At Mega Mountain, which is the fourth in the series of kids' flicks.
The Hulkster wears his toupee hat as Dave Dragon, one of the attractions at Mega Mountain.
He finally blows his top when the mighty mean Medusa holds the Mega Mountain amusement park hostage and demands a ransom of $10 million.
Did I mention that WKRP's Loni Anderson is Medusa. Now that's funny, too.
Anderson as Medusa is all leathered up with just enough cleavage to make 10-year-old boys wonder what all the excitement is about.
If Barbie had a motorcycle chick for a grandmother, it would be Loni Anderson as Medusa.
Competing in the peculiar department is Jim Varney, taking a break from his Ernest character to stretch his talent into the arena of sneering villain.
Trouble is the only thing scary about Varney's villain is the nasty way makeup applied his eyeliner.
Classic moment? Loni Anderson's Medusa takes on Hulk's Dragon. Ooh, you say, stylish slow-motion combat. And then you realize it's not stylish or slow-motion.
Meanwhile back at the stop-start action, the ninja brothers Rocky (Mathew Botuchis), Colt (Michael J. O'Laskey) and Tum Tum (J.P. Roeske) kick, chop and block up a storm. In short, the kids are all right.
And when the movie works, they make it work.
And you know how children like to watch bossy grownups get what they deserve.
As for Hogan, Anderson and Varney? Nobody deserves this -- not even them.
SUN RATING: 2 OUT OF 5