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   October 25, 2014



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Total Divas: Bazinga!
By JON WALDMAN -- SLAM! Wrestling


Total Divas aired Season 1.5, Episode 2 for the first time Sunday and I was curious. There's been plenty of tease for this season, and there's lots to talk about. Let's get right to the in-action.

We enter TD cold with Los Bellas talking with some sort of costumer about wardrobe for Psych. This means we learn their measurements and weight... yup, the critical things.

Nikki and John then look at their fish during move-in day. It's Nikki's first time living with a guy, we learn, but John... yeah we know that story.

John's nervous, especially when the sex toys come out. Okay Alex, I'll take "words I never thought I'd use in a SLAM! article post Attitude Era" for $400.

Backstage we're now at Raw and we learn more about Cena's injury. Okay this I can I can handle. Brie's pissed at her sister for staying with John instead of going on the Psych shoot. #tension.

Now this of course was the Raw after Daniel Bryan winning then losing the WWE Championship, but first we get Eva watching the Funkadactyls vs. AJ and Layla (by the way, Layla has completely disappeared from TV of late eh?). We then see Nattie with the greenhorns backstage talking with the Funks.

Eva is then invited to do in-ring announcing the following week for Raw, but goes through an on-spot test and does fairly... bad.

Quick cute to Cena making his big going-away announcement and I'm feeling like Vince Russo is behind the broadcast. We then get the D-Bry moment with both Bellas watching briefly, before we see Brie and Bryan backstage. Mark Caranno comes in and tells D-Bry with Cena on the shelf, he's doing more media which he's all good with.

Another Russo cut and we're on board with Cena and Nikki as they head to his elbow surgery. Nikki plays drama that this could be career ending, which timing being what it is... yeah. They then talk about scrotums. Maybe the sex toy talk wasn't that bad... Cena is then showed getting prepped for surgery. Nikki watches the surgery with some random bald guy (not Dwayne Gill). Yeah, this we needed to see. Now I'm longing for scrotum talk.

A bit later we're in recovery with Cena, Nikki and the random bald guy before we get to Eva with Alicia Fox. The two talk about the forthcoming Raw announcing. Yippee.

Russo Cut! Brie's in Vancouver for the Psych spot. Nikki's there too by the way. Apparently Psych is mainstream. Okay... So apparently Los Bellas are vampires for this scene.

Back to Tampa we see the Funks and Jimmy Uso. Jimmy farts and that ignites the girls.

Mark is then backstage with Eva and rips into her for the bad facts and using non WWE terms. Oh this is going to be good...

Back to Nikki and John we go, and despite just having had surgery, John's driving. Wow... he really is Superman. They then talk about Brie and Bryan before getting schmoopie. She also doesn't have her seatbelt on. Just saying.

We then get Trinity and Jon (Jimmy Uso) at home talking about a toe injury he has. She encourages him to get to a doctor. He won't go.

Russo cut time and we're at Brie and Bryan's home and they plan the sched for being out of town for the various events and added media responsibilities. They wrestle for a bit.

Next we're in Phoenix for the following Raw and Eva is looking nervous. Justin Roberts gives a couple sage words of advice before she meets with Nattie for final words and rehearsal amid makeup and hair. Eva contemplates cheating and bringing her iPhone out.

We get back from commercial and Nattie, Nikki and JoJo are watching backstage as the Usos make the entrance, followed by Justin Gabriel, 3MB then comes out and Eva blanks on Jinder Mahal. I'm pretty sure this was taped for Superstars, otherwise we would've been treated to Botch-A-Mania. Trinity and Ariane talk about Jimmy's toenail while the match goes on while we see some show of the bad foot.

Backstage, Mark confronts Eva while Trinity goes to confront Jimmy. His toe looks horrible. Legit. She's all "I told you so". Jinder and 3MB confront Eva later and she begs off. Heath Slater's better with her than Jinder is. She's just happy she didn't cheat.

Back at Casa Cena, Nikki plays nurse to John.... yup, that goes as expected.

Russo cut! We're with Jon and Trinity at the doc. Jon has a toe fungus and it's taken care of, while Trin learns that the fungus is contagious and worries about her own toes. She wants her toes looked at before they leave the clinic and sure enough she has some fungus. Yeah... this is entertaining.

Brie's then shown with her and Daniel's dog Jozie on Facetime with D-Bry. She misses him. Aww...

Russo clip time and we head back to Casa Cena and Nikki is fully moved in. John then whips out...

YES! It's the moment we've been waiting for folks! The Roommate Agreement!

Nikki's pissed as we learn that Cena isn't Superman, he's Sheldon Coooper! Episode saved! This made the sex toys, the scrotums, the blood, the surgery, all worth it.

Nikki's ripe pissed and confronts John. She needs time to think and decides to stay at a hotel for the night.

Yep, totally worth it.