August 12, 2011
Impact: Angle aligns with Hogan
By MATT BISHOP - SLAM! Wrestling

Tonight on Impact Wrestling: After taking the World Heavyweight Championship by using a chair Sunday at Hardcore Justice, new champion Kurt Angle explains his action tonight, eventually aligning with Hulk Hogan and promising to take out all of TNA's young guns.

Like usual, tonight's taped show emanates from the Impact Zone in Orlando, Fla. "The Professor" Mike Tenay and The Tazz are our hosts.

The show opens with the familiar music of Immortal. I can't believe this actually makes me yearn for the days when Main Event Mafia promos opened each show. Representing Immortal is Mr. Anderson, Bully Ray, Scott Steiner, Gunner and Abyss.

Ray tells Abyss he is turning into a big disappointment and yells at him for losing at the pay-per-view. He tells him he's on thin ice with Eric Bischoff. Ray says tonight there's a Bound For Glory Series match with him against Steiner against Gunner against Crimson. He guarantees Crimson his undefeated streak will come to an end tonight.

He then turns his attention to Anderson. He tells Anderson he took some of the best shots he could give and kept coming at him. He tells Anderson he's a tough SOB and belongs in Immortal. He says whatever they have between them is squashed. He says yeah, he pinned him at the pay-per-view, and that's because he's a better wrestler than Anderson. He says this is about Immortal and Ray becoming world champ. Ray offers his hand and Anderson laughs. Ray questions what he's doing. Now he gets offended, calling Anderson a moron. Anderson hits him. Then he attacks Steiner and then Gunner before everyone gangs up on him. They bust him open and then choke him with the chain.

Security tries to break it up but are quickly dispatched of. Now here come the agents to break it up. They get Immortal to leave and they bring out a stretcher for Anderson.

(Ads)

Match #1 - No. 1 Contender's Match - Madison Rayne (Seattle, Wash.) vs. Mickie James (Richmond, Va.)

James in control early. She hits a flapjack and then kips up. She goes to the top and hits the flying Thesz Press. She puts Rayne's tiara on and mocks her, turning her back. Rayne comes flying in to attack but right as she does, James bows and Rayne misses. She turns around right into the jumping DDT and that's all she wrote.

Winner via pinfall: Mickie James

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Match #2 - Robbie E (Seaside Heights, NJ) vs. Brian Kendrick (Venice, Calif.)

Cookie gives Kendrick the bad mouth as he hangs on the bottom rope. Now Robbie and Cookie are having communication issues. Maybe it's because they haven't been the show in what seems like a year. Kendrick fires up but Robbie gets ahold of him and holds him for Cookie to spray him with the hairspray right in front of the referee. What? But instead, Kendrick moves and it hits Robbie. Kendrick hits him with Sliced Bread No. 2 and that's it.

Winner via pinfall: Brian Kendrick

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Match #3 - Bound For Glory Series - The Pope (Harlem, NY) & Devon (New York City) vs. Beer Money vs. AJ Styles (Gainesville, Ga.) & Rob Van Dam (Battle Creek, Mich.)

Roode hits the Double R spinebuster on Pope but RVD breaks up the pin. This is just a mess. There's a billion things happening here. Everyone is hitting moves on everyone. Pope holds Roode for Devon to hit but Roode moves. Storm clotheslines Devon over the top and Roode hits Pope with a PerfectPlex and that's it.

Winner via pinfall: Beer Money

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The champ is here. Kurt Angle is out. He says Sting was at the wrong place at the wrong time. It isn't about him joining the dark side, but getting his integrity back. He talks about his ordeal with Jeff and Karen Jarrett. He says he has an informant who told him everything. He says a third party was involved and that was Dixie Carter. He said she said he was paranoid when he came to her about it but she knew about it all along. And because Sting is her ally and friend, he had to eliminate him at Hardcore Justice.

As Angle heads back up the ramp, Sting comes out with his bat. Sting knocks the chair out of Angle's hands with the bat and is threatening him when Hulk Hogan hits him with a chair. Angle grabs the mic and says his informant was Hogan. Hogan continues to beat Sting down with the chair, leading back to the ring. Hogan and Angle hold arms up and embrace.

(Ads)

Match #4 - Jackie (Tennessee) & ODB (Minneapolis, Minn.) vs. Tara (San Bernardino, Calif.) & Brooke Tessmacher (Houston, Texas)

Tessmacher gets the tag to Tara who comes in on Jackie. Now Jackie and ODB take over on Tara. ODB hits a fallaway slam and goes to the top but Tara crotches her and hits a superplex. Tessmacher in now and ODB and Jackie go to work on her but Tara spears ODB and Tessmacher rolls Jackie up for the fall.

Winners via pinfall: Brooke Tessmacher & Tara

(Ads)

The King and Queen of the Mountain are out, that's right, Jeff and Karen Jarrett are back from Mexico. They are dressed in their "Mexican garb" Tenay tells us. Jarrett says they've been crowned the King and Queen of Mexico. He says he was told he needs to be endorsed by the Mexican people, so he's gone out an gotten endorsed and has the Lopez Brothers in the back and they manicure the lawns at Universal Studios. He brings them to the ring and tells them to endorse the King and Queen. They respond, "Que?" Then they see Hector Guerrero doing Spanish commentary and completely mark out. Jarrett pulls them back in. Instead, they talk in Spanish about the Guerreros. Jarrett doesn't like this and attacks them. Then we see Guerrero pull his suit jacket off and he tries to hit the ring but Jarrett keeps him at bay. Guerrero grabs a chair from the crowd and the Jarretts bail.

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Match #5 - Bound For Glory Series - Crimson (Brooklyn, NY) vs. Scott Steiner (Detroit, Mich.) vs. Gunner (Atlanta, Ga.) vs. Bully Ray (New York City)

This is a four corners match, so you have to tag in and out.

Predictably, Immortal takes over quickly and works over Crimson. They double team him now with Steiner and Gunner doing the damage. Crimson, though, starts to fire up. He hits Steiner with a clothesline, sidesteps Gunner and sends him right into Ray, knocking him off the apron and then rolls Gunner up for the pin.

Winner via pinfall: Crimson

After the match, Kurt Angle, who said he was going to take out all of the young guns in TNA, attacks Crimson from behind and starts beating him with his shoe. Then he rips Crimson's knee brace off and starts hitting him with that. Now he wrenches Crimson's ankle and knee between the ropes as the show goes off the air.

Matt Bishop can be reached at bishop20@msu.edu. Please include your name and hometown. Click here to follow Matt on Twitter. Should be a good one!.


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