Tonight on TNA Impact: If you like brawls that seem to go on forever, well, TNA has got the show of the year for you. Sting and Mr. Anderson are at odds and Rob Van Dam isn't happy either. Elsewhere, Bully Ray has been bragging about taking out AJ Styles. Tonight, Styles' long-time friend returns to TNA and is out for vengeance.
Like usual, tonight's taped show emanates from the Impact Zone in Orlando, Fla. "The Professor" Mike Tenay and The Tazz are our hosts.
Mr. Anderson is out and he's dragging Earl Hebner to the ring with him in a headlock. Anderson wants to know why Hebner was the one who rang the bell and disqualified him last week. They get into a screaming match and Hebner says his shirt stands for authority and respect and he better get it. Anderson pushes him and Hebner says if Anderson pushes him again he's going to suspend him for 90 days. Hebner says Anderson got DQ'd because he put his hands on Sting, the acting official.
Anderson says Hebner better reverse the decision right now or he'll do something he'll enjoy but Hebner will regret. Hebner is defiant and says the decision stands. He goes to walk away but Anderson grabs him, knees him in the gut and goes for the Mic Check but Brian Hebner runs down to make the save. Anderson picks the mic back up and asks Brian if he wants to screw him, too. Now he's offering Earl a free shot. He goes to take it but Brian cuts him off and Sting's music hits. He comes out and he's not wasting anytime.
Sting says why doesn't Anderson pick on him instead of referees. Anderson says something about this being asshole country and then Sting says he's here to disrespect him and hits hit. They start brawling until security runs down to separate them. Then Rob Van Dam's music hits. RVD says he doesn't want that tainted victory and implores Earl to make the match at Lockdown a three-way. Earl says he can't reverse the decision and then Hulk Hogan and Eric Bischoff come out. Hogan says consider it done.
Bischoff holds Hogan up and says he has another idea. They talk about ratings. Bischoff says tonight Anderson, RVD and Sting will face Abyss, Matt Hardy and Bully Ray in a steel cage.
Now Sting and Anderson start brawling again before being broken up. How many segments in TNA end with security breaking people up?
Match #1 - Shannon Moore (Whispering Pines, NC) vs. Scott Steiner (Detroit, Mich.)
Back elbow by Steiner. He whips Moore into the corner and catches him with a belly-to-belly as he comes out of the corner. Moore, though, goes after Steiner's knee and drops him to the mat. He continues working the leg and then mocks Steiner's pushups. Now he puts on Steiner's chain mail and mocks Steiner some more. He goes for a moonsault but Steiner moves. He lines Moore up and sends him into orbit with a belly-to-belly. Big punch and a stiff Steinerline take Moore down then he hits the pushup elbow. Steiner lifts Moore and puts him on the top turnbuckle and hits the Frankensteiner. That's it.
Winner via pinfall: Scott Steiner
After the match, Eric Young and Orlando Jordan, who were on commentary, go down to congratulate Steiner and Crimson but they are attacked from behind by Douglas Williams and Magnus, who apparently are reuniting as a tag team.
Match #2 - Max Buck (Los Angeles, Calif.) vs. Jeremy Buck (Los Angeles, Calif.)
Max tells Jeremy to lay down and give him the win but he's not having any part of this. Two hip-tosses for Jeremy and then an arm drag and Max takes a walk. Jeremy invites Max back into the ring and holds the ropes open for him. Jeremy offers his hand but Max pulls him in for a headlock.
Springboard armdrag for Jeremy, then a back elbow and a dropkick. Max is stunned. They trade holds and Jeremy goes spilling to the floor. Now Max offers to hold the ropes for him only it's a double cross. He kicks him as he's entering, then hits a corner power bomb and a Sliced Bread and that's it.
Winner via pinfall: Max Buck
Match #3 - Velvet Sky vs. Winter
Velvet attacks Winter right off the bat and runs her repeatedly into the turnbuckle. She does it again and has to be pulled off to Earl Hebner again. She tries again but Winter moves and pulls her to the canvas. And again. Body slam for Winter and then she chokes Velvet with her boot. She lifts Velvet in a fireman's carry but she slips out and hits two clotheslines and a kick. She follows that with a bulldog.
Now Angelina Love is slowly walking down the ramp. This distracts Velvet and Winter takes over and chokes her on the ropes. She hits a swinging backbreaker and follows up with a choke with a knee on the back and Velvet taps.
Winner via submission: Velvet Sky
Well, Mr. Anderson is out again. He calls out Sting and Sting's music immediately hits. I guess he was waiting. And here comes the champ. They face off. Anderson punches him. They brawl. Again. Forever. Instead of security, this time they are attacked by Matt Hardy, Abyss and Bully Ray. They are getting beatdown until RVD comes out and he makes the save for Sting, but just walks away, allowing Hardy and Abyss to continue working Anderson over.
Kurt Angle is out and he calls out Jeff Jarrett. Here comes Jarrett with Rob Terry. Jarrett distracts Angle as Terry attacks and the bell rings. Apparently this is a match.
Match #3 - Kurt Angle (Pittsburgh, Pa.) vs. Rob Terry (Cardiff, Wales)
Angle counters Terry and applies the ankle lock. He pulls Terry away from the ropes, grapevines the leg and that's a wrap.
Winner via submission: Kurt Angle
Angle turns his sights to Jarrett. He grabs his leg but Jarrett's shoe falls out. Jarrett tries running but Angle catches him and tries to give up the Angle Slam on the stage but Jarrett escapes. They're on the run backstage and Angle runs into Karen Jarrett and a bunch of cops. They arrest Angle for violating his restraining order.
Match #4 - Steel Cage Match - Abyss (Parts Unknown), Bully Ray (New York City) & Matt Hardy (Cameron, NC) vs. Rob Van Dam (Battle Creek, Mich.), Mr. Anderson (Green Bay, Wisc.) & Sting (Venice Beach, Calif.)
Well, this gets off to a rip-roaring start. Sting attacks Anderson from behind as Anderson is doing his entrance, then Ric Flair low blows RVD as he watches it. Flair loads RVD into the cage and now Sting joins and this is now a handicap match.
Heel beatdown. Anderson recovers and comes to ringside and sits in a chair.
Anderson is still sitting there when Hulk Hogan's music hits. He comes down and tells Anderson to get his butt into the cage. Hogan rakes Anderson's eyes, throws him into the side of the cage and then puts him in. Sting grabs him and throws him into the cage. Heels continue to beatdown the "babyfaces."
After all the men brawling in the ring forever, this suddenly breaks into a regular tag team match inside the cage. Sting tries to build a comeback against Hardy but he can't tag RVD and Hardy brings in Abyss. Bully Ray comes in and he and Abyss both charge Sting but he ducks and they ram into each other. Sting gets a clothesline in on both and brings in RVD. He goes to work but the numbers game catches up as Abyss hits him from behind.
RVD, though, hits a kick off the top and goes for the Five-Star Frog Splash but Anderson makes a miraculous recovery and pushes RVD off the top. Ray grabs RVD, hits the Bubba Bomb and that'll do it.
Winners via pinfall: Bully Ray, Abyss & Matt Hardy
Heels continue the beatdown after Anderson takes off. Then Fortune's music hits and they come running out. As his guys are getting beaten on, Flair locks the cage for some reason. But then Ray grabs his chain and uses it as an equalizer. Now there are five babyfaces down in the ring at the hands of three heels. Robert Roode and Kazarian are bleeding. This is just going on and on and on and all of a sudden, Christopher Daniels comes through the crowd, climbs the cage and comes flying down onto Ray, Abyss and Hardy. He's wearing an AJ Styles shirt and does Styles' signature pose. The man is here for revenge.
Matt Bishop can be reached at email@example.com. Please include your name and hometown. Click here to follow Matt on Twitter. Should be a good one!.