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Impact: 'They' explain their actions, Carter given the boot
By MATT BISHOP - SLAM! Wrestling


Tonight on TNA Impact: Well, if you are a fan of actual wrestling, tonight's show probably isn't for you. In fact, there was probably more wrestling on Reaction than Impact tonight. Tonight we find out why "they" formed and the motives behind their actions.

As always, tonight's taped show emanates from the Impact Zone in Orlando, Fla. "The Professor" Mike Tenay and The Tazz are our hosts.

Eric Bischoff is backstage with Dixie Carter's lawyer talking about the contracts Carter signed last week. He says she signed them under false pretenses. Bischoff says this is his show and then kicks him out.

Hulk Hogan's music hits and "they" make their way out. It's Hogan on crutches and Bischoff here to start. Hogan plays guitar on his crutches. What transpired next was straight out of 1997 WCW as Bischoff gives Hogan the grand introduction. Am I watching Nitro? Hogan says they decided it was time to take what was theirs. He says they wanted to do it the easy way but Carter didn't want to do it like that. He says Carter sold him a bill of goods. He says he just grabbed what was promised to him and made it theirs. He refers to himself as Hollywood Hogan. Bischoff said nobody saw it coming. Well, except for Sting, Kevin Nash, The Pope and 1 million viewers each week. He says it starts with Abyss. Bischoff says nobody could figure out why Abyss turned on Hogan except for them. So he welcomes out the biggest member of Team Hogan, Abyss.

Abyss says he is their soldier and he follows their orders. He says he will destroy anything or anyone that stands in their way. Hogan says Abyss is immortal.

Bischoff says it didn't start out right with this man, but they are cut from the same cloth. He welcomes Jeff Jarrett to the ring. Jarrett says Carter took the company he founded right out from under his nose and "used daddy's money to run me right out of my own office." He says it's been a pleasure to work with Bischoff and Hogan. He says they gave the entire Carter family exactly what they deserved. Jarrett says everybody in TNA has to play by the new rules that are dictated by the new regime.

As he says this, Fortune's music fires up and the entire group makes its way out. They stand off and Flair has a mic. Flair says in Hogan's absence, he probably hasn't been watching the show, but this company is run by Fortune. He calls Fortune the blood and guts of TNA. He says he's hated Hogan's guts for 25 years and nothing's changing and tonight, one of them is walking away. Hogan says how about him and Flair. Flair says "how about it?" and takes his jacket off. They get close and then hug. All the members of both groups embrace. Flair rubs Bischoff down. Bischoff explains that Fortune is upset that Carter brought in EV2 and that was the nail in her coffin. Hogan calls Flair the greatest wrestler of all time and says he was destined to make this plan work.

Bischoff then welcomes the new TNA World Heavyweight Champion Jeff Hardy to the ring. Hardy comes out sans face paint. The crowd chants "you sold out" but Hardy says he didn't sell out, he sold in. He says popularity doesn't mean a thing to him. Hardy calls Rob Van Dam a politician. Hardy says he's the reason Abyss destroyed RVD. Hardy says Team Hogan is immortal and they live forever.

Bischoff then welcomes Sting and Nash to the ring. They are shown in the back and stand up as we go to…

(Ads)

Sting and Nash make their way to the ring. Bischoff says this is over the top and they're probably gloating, but he says this is about money. He says everybody in the ring is willing to put the past behind them and they want them on the team. Nash says it's almost a perfect fit for him. His whole career has been about money, he says. He didn't care about anything other than money. But, he says, as he got older, he got wiser. He says those people in the back that he would've taken every dollar from in the past and now his friends. He says he's going to pass on the money and wants nothing to do with them.

Sting says when he first came to TNA, he didn't do it for this, he did it because he loves TNA. He says he's not going to repeat history again, so the answer is no. Nash and Sting take off. Bischoff asks them if they are nuts. He says it's always about money and power. Bischoff says if they change their minds, they'll know where to find them.

Backstage, The Pope is asking Nash and Sting why they're walking out. Nash says there's room in the car for him. Pope says he's going to continue to fight the fight. Nash and Sting are fine with this. Then Carter walks up and pleads with them to not leave. Sting says they tried to tell her. She says they used cryptic language and that if they spoke in plain English she would've listened. They tell her flat out she wouldn't have. They leave and Bischoff and Hogan walk up. She screams at them and asks them what they are doing. Carter wants Hogan to look her in the eye and tell her he screwed her. She screams "tell me!" at him. Hogan says if she wants to have this conversation with him they can have it in his office.

(Ads)

In Hogan's office, he admits that he did indeed screw Carter out of the company. She screams "why!?!" Hogan says that for any person he worked for he been available to talk to. He infers she wasn't. Hogan says it's his company. Carter says this isn't over. Bischoff is just great here. Carter tries to get Gunner and Murphy to kick Hogan and Bischoff out. Then Hogan says they are working for him and tells them "to get this piece of trash out of my office." As they are taking her away, the shining white knight, her husband Serge, puts his hands on one of them and he turns around and drops Serge like a bad habit and continue hauling Dixie away.

(Ads)

Well, after all that, Madison Rayne is out with an official. She grabs a mic. She says her title is around Tara's waist right now. She calls Tara out and demands a title match right now.

Tara comes out and Rayne says Tara owes her and that they had a deal. Tara hands the belt to the ref and we have a match apparently.

Match #1 - TNA Knockouts Championship - (c) Tara (State of California) vs. Madison Rayne (Seattle, Wash.)

Rayne tells Tara to do the right thing. Tara lies down and Rayne pins her.

Winner via pinfall and NEW TNA Knockouts Champion: Madison Rayne

Rayne celebrates like she just hit the game-winning home run in the World Series and starts giving a victory speech when Mickie James comes out. James says Rayne made a mockery of the championship. She said she said she's coming for the title and there's no better time than now. Rayne sends Tara to handle James but she easily dispatches of her. Rayne bails.

(Ads)

Kurt Angle is out with no theme music. Crowd chants "please don't go." Angle says he wants to get a few things off his chest. He wants to know why Hogan and Bischoff screwed him at Bound For Glory. He says if he's going to retire, he's going to need some answers. He says he didn't win the title at Bound For Glory but he didn't get pinned either. He says he's in a dilemma right now. That's when Jeff Jarrett makes his way to the stage. Jarrett says of all people, he can't believe Angle is out here making excuses. Jarrett says he'll never, ever forget how Angle made his life a living hell. He says he vowed to himself that he'd turn the tide one day at any cost.

Angle asks how he made Jarrett's life a living hell. Was it by putting TNA on the map? Was it teaching the rookies everything he knew? Or was it that, when he came in, it wasn't about Jarrett anymore. He asks Jarrett how many TNA titles Jarrett won before he came in and how many since. He says Jarrett held everybody down. Jarrett says that had nothing to do with it, it had to do with getting back what was his. He says he took Angle's life and now he took his career and the career was the final nail in the coffin. This upsets Angle and he starts making his way up the stage but he is cut off by Gunner and Murphy. They handcuff Angle as Jarrett puts the boots to him. They lift Angle up and Angle spits in Jarrett's face. Jarrett beats on him some more and then takes Angle and rams him head-first into the riser near the announce table. He beats on him some more before Taz drops his headset and gets in Jarrett's face, telling him that's enough.

(Ads)

Match #2 - Abyss (Parts Unkown) vs. Samoa Joe (Isle of Samoa)

In a taped promo before the match, Joe was angry and wants revenge on Jarrett for Sunday.

Joe is rolling early with punches and kicks but Abyss stops him in his tracks with a choke slam. Then he goes to the outside and grabs a chair. Joe gets up and hits a suicide dive onto Abyss. This angers Abyss when he recovers and he grabs the ring bell and drills Joe with it.

Winner via disqualification: Samoa Joe

Thankfully Abyss was nice enough to give the bell back so it could be rung repeatedly. Joe is busted open and is being punched by Abyss when RVD's music hits. Abyss bails.

Joe recovers and takes off and RVD grabs a mic.

He's angry at Jeff Hardy. Shortly into his speech, Hardy pops up in a pre-taped video on the big screen. Hardy makes our second Bible reference of the show. Bischoff comes out. Bischoff says RVD wants a title shot, but it's going to be RVD against Mr. Anderson tonight for the title shot at Turning Point.

(Ads)

Match #3 - Handicap Match - The Pope (Harlem, NY) vs. AJ Styles (Gainesville, Ga.), Kazarian (Anaheim, Calif.), Douglas Williams (The United Kingdom), Robert Roode (Wall Street) & James Storm (Leiper's Fork, Tenn.)

Pope gets going on different members on Fortune but when he decks Ric Flair on the outside, Matt Morgan drills him with the Carbon Footprint. They roll Pope back in the ring. Styles covers him but lifts his shoulder up at two. Now they are going to town on Pope. Somehow, though, Pope perseveres through this beating and ducks a Pele from Styles and that hits Kazarian. He rolls Kazarian up for two. Behind the referee's back, Beer Money hits Pope with the DWI and Kazarian makes the cover.

Winners via pinfall: Fortune

(Ads)

It's now the moment we've all been waiting for. The Shore, Robbie E. and Cookie, are out. Crowd chants "who are you" at them. Robbie tells everyone that they are on at the same time as Jersey Shore. He says as far as he's concerned, Jersey Shore is done.

Then someone named "J-Woww" comes out with The Beautiful People. I guess she's from Jersey Shore. Cookie gets in her face. J-Woww takes her earrings off. Cookie tells her to take all her fake parts and get out of their house. Cookie slaps her but J-Woww isn't taking any of this and takes her down and starts slapping her. The Beautiful People dispatch of Robbie as J-Woww goes to town on Cookie until she's finally pulled away by The Beautiful People.

That segment greatly enriched my life and I only wish I could see segments like that on end for the rest of my life. I am truly a better person for having seen that. J-Woww is an inspiration to all for the way she handled her situation with Cookie with class and dignity.

(Ads)

Match #4 - No. 1 Contender's Match - Mr. Anderson (Green Bay, Wisc.) vs. Rob Van Dam (Battle Creek, Mich.)

RVD hits a moonsault off the apron to the outside as Impact goes off the air. For those keeping score at home, the match hadn't even started during Impact's two-hour time slot. Back in the ring, Anderson hits a superplex. Back elbow connects for two for Anderson. Knee to the gut sends RVD head over heels for two.

RVD tries Rolling Thunder but Anderson gets out of the way. RVD, though, overtakes him and drops him in the corner and hits the split-leg moonsault for two. Anderson stops an Irish whip attempt and hits the plunge for two. Anderson misses a high-risk maneuver and RVD goes for the Five-Star Frog Splash but Anderson gets the knees up. Then Bischoff comes out and talks to referee Brian Hebner and pulls him out of the ring and to the back with him. Then Jeff Hardy comes out and pastes both RVD and Anderson. He Pillmanizes Anderson's arm and then drops RVD with the Twist of Fate onto Anderson's arm. And that's the end of the match.

This match is a no contest

Matt Bishop can be reached at bishop20@msu.edu. Please include your name and hometown. Click here to follow Matt on Twitter. Should be a good one!.