Smackdown!: Revving up for Over the Limit
DAVE HILLHOUSE -- SLAM! Wrestling
In the final show before Sunday’s pay-per-view event, Smackdown! uses Ottawa, Ontario as the place to further the feud between several opponents facing off in two days’ time. Big Show also potentially breaks copyright law by stealing Jack Swagger’s “Fun Facts” segment, and CM Punk attempts to open a Canadian chapter of the Straight Edge Society.
The show opens with Punk, Luke Gallows, and Serena in the ring, curiously accompanied by three young men in chairs between them. CM Punk is quiet at first, letting Gallows and Serena do the talking, encouraging the fans in attendance to respect their leader. Punk explains that the three men are here to pledge their allegiance to him (note: the one in the middle looks like a ringer). The ceremony goes pretty smoothly, including the men losing their hair, until Rey Mysterio emerges to display a picture of Punk missing his hair. Punk is enraged by the photo-shopped insult and, after the break, takes out his anger on the three new SES members, levelling them all with the help of Gallows and Serena. That’s the last straw: I’m not joining his club.
Match #1 – Layla (C) and Michelle McCool (C) vs Kelly Kelly and Tiffany
It’s true: Team Laycool is pronouncing themselves as Co-Women’s Champions. Why not? The Spirit Squad and Demolition both played around with more than two tag team champs. Kelly and Tiffany actually dominate the match, highlighted by a pretty good flying cross body block by Kelly to McCool on the floor – but McCool catches Tiffany in a facebreaker for the win.
Winner via pinfall: Michelle McCool and Layla.
Big Show addresses the crowd from backstage, presenting Fun Facts About Big Show. While he is proud of being an Eagle Scout and amateur wrestling champ, he really just wants to show footage of knocking out Jack Swagger a few weeks back.
Match #2 – JTG Caylen Croft (w/ Trent Barreta)
JTG is outsmarting and outrunning Croft early on, but Croft starts landing punches and kicks without any respite. Barreta attempts to distract JTG, but it backfires and instead lets JTG sneak in the win.
Winner via pinfall: JTG
Backstage, Vickie Guerrero is pleased to hear Christian confirm that the Peep Show returns tonight, though she’s upset that he won’t choose her as his first guest. All Christian will say as is that he and his guest have never seen eye to eye.
Match #3 – Curt Hawkins and Vance Archer vs. Brent Roberts and Jeremy Burner
Hawkins displays a nice scoop slam and Archer provides the raw power game as they execute some good double-teaming. After Archer hits an inverse DDT, Hawkins plays Shawn Michaels (who was really playing Randy Savage) with an elbow off the rope for the win. By the way – neither announcer named Roberts or Burner as they were in the ring, so the beatings remain anonymous. After the win, Hawkins takes the HBK impression a step further as Archer plays Diesel for the ol’ jumping high-five.
Winner via pinfall: Curt Hawkins and Vance Archer
Another Fun Fact About Big Show: he recently threw Jack Swagger through an announcer’s table, and has the video footage to prove it.
Match #4 – Jack Swagger (C) vs. Kofi Kingston - non-title match
Swagger enters with a new haircut and a scowl on his face; and no push-ups = no fun. After addressing the crowd and becoming visibly shaken by the memory of Big Show’s disrespect last week, Swagger asserts his strength over Kingston early on. Soon, though, the champ finds himself being clotheslined over the top rope and is more angry than hurt. Upon return from the break, Swagger ends up outside the ring again and catches Kingston on his shoulders as he attempted a dive from inside the ring. Swagger runs Kingston into the ringpost and starts a campaign against his back. The champ spends a little too much time slapping Kingston around, though, and finds himself receiving both a DDT and an SOS – but he dodges Trouble in Paradise to regain the advantage. Things go badly for the champ, though, when Big Show walks down the ramp with one more thing to say. With Swagger distracted, Kingston gets the win – leaving Big Show and Kingston laughing and the champ seething, as Big Show’s announcement was simply that Kingston beat Swagger.
Winner via pinfall: Kofi Kingston.
After the break, the Peep Show has been set up in the ring as Christian welcomes Hornswoggle as his guest (get it? Not seeing eye to eye?). Christian is determined to feed the U.S. audience an image of Canadians still largely based on Bob and Doug Mackenzie as he teaches Hornswoggle how to say “Eh”, “Hoser”, “Hockey” and “Beer”. Vickie and Chavo interrupt, as Vickie says she’s cancelling the show. As Chavo heads towards the ring to enforce her edict, Dolph Ziggler nails Christian from behind.
Match #5 – MVP and Rey Mysterio, Jr. vs. Luke Gallows and CM Punk (w/ Serena)
Punk and Mysterio continue to amass an awful lot of time in the ring together, though initially it’s Punk holding the advantage over MVP. MVP blocks Punk’s running knee in the corner, though, but can’t make the tag to Mysterio. MVP subsequently receives a lot of punishment from both Punk and Gallows before finally bringing in Mysterio who takes control of the match. As Gallows lies in position for the 619, Punk blindly tags himself in and drills Mysterio with a clothesline. The masked assailant appears but, like Barreta’s attempt to intervene earlier, fails to help Punk at all who is rolled up by Mysterio for the win.
Winner via pinfall: Rey Mysterio, Jr. and MVP.
Backstage, Josh Matthews is listening to Drew McIntyre explain why he deserves to be the chosen one before Kingston interrupts to assert that he deserves to be champion. A staredown ensues.
Match #6 – Drew McIntyre (C) vs. Big Show - non-title match
This isn’t so much a match as it is a beatdown and chopfest for McIntyre. The Intercontinental Champ must have been thrilled to see Swagger interfere and start working over Big Show, presumably awarding him the match by disqualification although it’s not announced. It isn’t long, regardless, before Big Show gets his bearings back and looks to turn the tables on Swagger – but the clash between them will have to wait for Sunday.
Dave Hillhouse is a screenwriter and teacher, and was once the co-co-holder of Mick Foley and Edge’s Hardcore Championship.