April 19, 2010
RAW: Monday Night Smackdown Live?
By DALE PLUMMER -- SLAM! Wrestling

As much as Vince McMahon would hate to admit it, there are some things that are beyond his control. Mother Nature for instance, due to an Icelandic volcano spewing ash over northern Europe, the RAW superstars are stuck in the United Kingdom. So the WWE is having the Smackdown! Superstars fill in at tonight's show in the Meadowlands, along with a healthy dose of Saturday Night Live.

Well, actually, Triple H kicks off the show, since he didnít make the trip across the Pond. Hunter tries his stand up act, at the expense of the Big Show. Triple H tells the crowd not to worry, because the WWE brass has been working overtime to make sure the show is of the highest standard. Hunter doesnít forget to plug the upcoming pay per view. CM Punk and his Straight Edge Society interrupt.

Punk rips New Jersey, saying it sucks. (And I canít disagree with that.) He then talks about the upcoming WWE draft, and if Punk gets drafted to RAW he is bringing the Society with him. Punk doesnít appreciate the jokes by Triple H, and doesnít like being questioned. Punk pushes his PPV match with Rey Mysterio, and then starts his recruiting spiel with Triple H. I donít think Hunter is signing up anytime soon.

Hunter says he would like to, but he enjoys being free. He likes the freedom to choose what he wants to do. Punk says he isnít asking Hunter to join, heís telling him. Gallows and Punk jump Hunter, as Serena grabs a pair of hair clippers. Rey Mysterio runs in, decimating the SES. Hunter gets back to his feet, and Punk is outnumbered. Rey grabs the clippers, as Hunter grabs Punk. Mysterio gets a handful of hair, before Gallows saves his leader.

Tonightís guest hosts are the stars of the upcoming movie, MacGruber. Another winning Saturday Night Live skit turned into a movie. More importantly, though, with ring announcer Justin Roberts stuck in Europe, Lillian Garcia has returned for one night only to fill in.

Match #1 Ė Drew McIntyre vs. Matt Hardy

McIntyre pulls Hardy off the turnbuckle, and gets the pin. McIntyre wore Hardy down to get the victory.

Winner via pinfall: Drew McIntyre

WWE John Cena joins us via satellite to cut a promo on Batista.

The WWE draft is next week during a three hour RAW.

Vladimir Kozlov is in the ring protesting the way he has been treated. He wants The King to read his statement in the ring. Kozlov is not happy with the treatment he has received from the RAW guest hosts. He wants better competition. He then rips Jersey.

MacGruber (Will Forte) and Vicki St. Elmo (Kristen Wig) hit the ring waving the American Flag. Vicki reads a statement from Mr. McMahon outlining tonightís main event. MacGruber then stands up for New Jersey, listing some of the more famous residents. He then rips on Kozlovís mom. Kozlov says he will destroy MacGruber, but Kozlov already has a match, with R-Truth. Unfortunately, Truth is blown up on the stage, and MacGruber, who may have had something to do with it, looks terrified. Kozlov is looking forward to his match with MacGruber.

Itís time for another MacGruber sketch, this time with a wrestling theme. Triple H catches him trying to exit the building, and notices MacGruber has wet his pants.

World Heavyweight Champion Jack Swagger issues an open challenge for tonight. No one steps up, until the lights go out, and the bells toll. Enter the Undertaker.

Match #2 Ė Jack Swagger vs. The Undertaker

Swagger and Taker lock up, and Swagger is shot off the ropes. He takes the Dead Man down with a shoulder block. Undertaker takes Swagger on an Old School walk. Swagger responds with a scoop slam. The fight spills to the floor, and Swagger is slammed into the steel steps. Swagger turns the tables though, by whipping Taker into the opposing ring steps. Swagger focuses on the injured leg. Taker yanks Swagger out of the ring, and stomps away at him on the floor. The Dead Man the drops the guillotine leg on the apron. Back in the ring, Taker hits a snap suplex.

After the break, Swagger is in full control, until Taker locks in a body scissors. Swagger breaks the hold, but is tossed out of the ring. The champ pulls Undertaker to the apron, and then slams his leg around the ring post. Swagger and Taker trade punches. Undertaker nails a swinging DDT, and Swagger kicks out at two. Swagger falls victim to Snake Eyes and then a leg drop. The Dead Man looks for the chokeslam, but Swagger fights out, only to be felled by a big boot. Swagger hits a DDT, but canít get the pin. The champ goes for the splash out of the corner, but Undertaker catches him by the throat and hits the chokeslam. The Dead Man follows with the Tombstone Piledriver and covers Swagger for the win.

Winner: The Undertaker

The MacGruber trailer is shown, and boy Val Kilmer has really let himself go. And it looks like Chris Jericho has a cameo in the film.

Speaking of Jericho, he is telling the Straight Edge Society to listen to him and they will be fine. He then runs into MacGruber who sucks up to him. Jericho pitches his idea for the sequel. MacGruber is looking for advice for taking on Kozlov. Jericho tells him to throw Kozlov off his game. (I tell you what, Kristen Wig and Will Forte are knocking their performances out of the park.)

Match #3 Ė Vladimir Kozlov vs. MacGruber w/ Vicki St. Elmo

MacGruber extends his hand to shake, and then slaps Kozlov. Vladimir picks up MacGruber, when movie co-star, Ryan Phillippe walks out on stage. He apologizes for being late, but says this has now been made into a handicapped match. MacGruber will be teaming with his long lost half brother, Khaluber. Thatís right itís the Great Khali, and Iím out. Iím done. Khaluber knocks Kozlov from the ring, and chases him up the ramp. Kozlov gets counted out, and MacGruber gets the win.

Winner via countout: MacGruber

MacGruber then plugs Shrek 4, until his co-stars tell him to plug his movie.

Match #4 Ė Triple H, Rey Mysterio, and Edge vs. Chris Jericho, CM Punk, and Luke Gallows w/ Serena

As Triple H makes his entrance, Sheamus has words for him over the TitanTron. Sheamus shows how tough he is by beating up the production crew. (Seriously, those guys need to address this with the union.)

Punk runs into a boot from Mysterio in the corner, but it doesnít stop him from slamming Rey into the turnbuckle. Gallows tags in, and continues the beating on Mysterio before tagging in Jericho. Rey is dropped with a back suplex. Jericho catapults Rey into the corner, and then drops him with a punch. Mysterio gets a near fall with a springboard moonsault. Edge gets the hot tag, dropping Gallows with a neck breaker. Edge looks for the spear, but Serena distracts the ref, so Jericho can pull him out of the ring. Punk tags in to take advantage of an injured Edge. Jericho gets a quick tag, and goes to work on the injured ankle of Edge. Punk enters the ring to wear down Edge.

Hunter gets a tag, and takes down Punk with a high knee and then a facebuster. A clothesline leads to a near fall, and Trips follows with a spinebuster. Gallows runs in to stop the Pedigree, but is then taken out by Mysterio. Jericho tosses Rey, but Mysterio is able to run back in to hit Punk with the 619. Hunter follows with a Pedigree and covers to get the win.

Winner via pinfall: Triple H, Rey Mysterio, and Edge

Dale Plummer has been writing for SLAM! Wrestling since 2003. Dale would like to see more SNL characters host RAW. His list includes The Rock Obama, Wayne and Garth, and Opera Man. Follow Daleís Twitter feed @DPlummer627 for more updates.


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