Superstars: Hart Dynasty, Gallows, Ryder featured on Thursday night
MATT JOHNSON - SLAM! Wrestling
Reportedly, wrestling fans have been calling the Midwest Ambulance to check on the condition of Bret Hart following the February 15 Raw. It is really shocking to me that fans still by into stories like this as reality, since WWE so often pulls the veil back on its own show on the air so often. It is a positive sign that the storyline is gaining traction with fans, however.
On to Supestars.
Match #1 –Jack Swagger & William Regal vs. Santino Marella & Chris Masters
I must have missed the show when William Regal joined the Raw roster. Michael Cole probably announced it, but I probably was tuning him out as usual. Santino gets in his comedy offense against Regal and then Swagger, but Swagger turns the match around with a clothesline. Regal tags in. Santino tries to apply the Cobra, but Regal blocks it. Santino gets knocked outside the ring and I unsuccessfully predict a commercial break.
Santino gives the hot tag to Masters who tries to apply the Master Lock on Swagger. Masters does not get it, but he does hit a splash on Swagger. After Regal interferes, Swagger clips Masters. Swagger then hits a gut wrench powerbomb and gets the pin.
Winner via pinfall: Jack Swagger & William Regal
A Rent-a-Center commercial airs featuring Hulk Hogan and Hall of Fame football player Troy Aikman. It is actually pretty surreal seeing these two personalities in the same place. I think it is an effective advertising technique to get two very different celebrities together. It makes the viewer pause out of curiosity.
Did you know that more people watched WWE Superstars last week than College Basketball on ESPN? Well, I did not know that, but I would have guessed it. Despite the perception of many people, ESPN usually does not draw high ratings.
Match #2 –Zack Ryder vs. Primo Colon
Zack Ryder should have went to Smackdown. He is going to be nothing but an undercard wrestler on Raw. Perhaps he is on Raw because he already played Edge’s stooge on Smackdown. Does Primo wrestle on Superstars every single week? It sure seems like it to me. One more note before I talk about the match. Michael Cole absolutely cracks himself up with his own joke. Does Cole realize how lame it is to laugh hysterically at his own jokes?
Primo hits a dropkick at attacks Ryder in the corner. Ryder knocks Primo off the top turnbuckle and catapults him into the bottom rope. Ryder throws on a headlock. When Primo tries to fight out, Ryder hits the Rough Ryder. Primo hits Ryder with an elbow and hits a tornado DDT. I credit the luchadores in WCW for teaching me the name of that maneuver. While Primo is standing on the apron, he gets into an argument with Rosa. He then misses a cross body from the top rope and Ryder hits the Zack Attack for the win. Quick, describe the move known as the Rough Ryder. Bet you didn’t pass that quiz.
Winner via pinfall: Zack Ryder
A video airs on the first episode of WWE NXT. My mind is not made up on the show. It was not that great, but I appreciate WWE trying something new, so I must withhold judgment.
Match #3 –Luke Gallows vs. Sylas Young
Luke Gallows takes on Silas Young in this contest. I actually saw Sylas Young have an awesome match in the main event of an independent show in the Green Bay, Wisconsin area. Hopefully he catches the eyes of WWE brass.
Gallows dedicates the match to their cult leader. Gallows hits a slap and a slam on Young early. Young shows great facial expressions. Young tries to fight back with some very quick offense but Gallows knocks him to the corner and hits a splash. Gallows kind of looks like Barry Darsow. Gallows hits a backbreaker and the Gallows Pole before getting the pin.
Winner via pinfall: Luke Gallows
The Raw Rebound airs and a video on the Michaels-Undertaker feud. They then show the matches signed for Wrestlemania so far. Apparently “Thunderstruck” by AC/DC is one of themes for Wrestlemania. Great choice!
Match #4 –The Great Khali, Matt Hardy & Maria vs. The Hart Dynasty & Natalya
Tyson Kidd and Matt Hardy exchange headlocks early. Hardy hits some elbows and a leg drop on Tyson. With Tyson on the apron, Hardy knocks him outside the ring and its off to commercial we go
Hardy gets a near fall after the break before tagging in Khali. D.H. Smith tags in for the Hart Dynasty. Khali hits a giant chop (no pun intended) and a big boot (ditto). Natalya tags in forcing Maria to enter. Maria tries to fight Natalya, but Natalya throws her to the mat and applies a submission maneuver. Natalya hits a slam and chops Khali in the corner. Tyson tries to apply a move on Maria, but Maria slaps him. Hardy tags in and goes after Tyson. Justin Gabriel is shown watching in the back. D.H. Smith tags in, but Hardy hits the Side Effect for a two count. Tyson tags in and the Hart Dynasty hits the Hart Attack and gets the pin.
Winner via pinfall: The Hart Dynasty & Natalya
Grisham says after the match that the Hart Dynasty got wild and woolly. George Carlin once stated that he understand the word “wild”, but did not understand “wooly.” Carlin was a comedic genius. Superstars was decent this week. Whenever Tyson Kidd is in a main event, it is a pretty sure bet that it will be solid.
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