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RAW: John Cena and DX are on Dream Street
By DALE PLUMMER -- SLAM! Wrestling


I guess my cable company doesn’t read WWE.com. If they did the description of tonight’s show wouldn’t tell me that there is a surprise guest host. Instead, it would say The American Dream Dusty Rhodes hosts WWE Monday Night RAW from Detroit, tonight.

Lillian Garcia introduces Dusty Rhodes. The Dream mentions his induction into the WWE Hall of Fame in Detroit at Wrestlemania 23. Rhodes says he is proud of his son, Cody, even though he gets an attitude running around with Orton. The Dream says there’s nothing a father wouldn’t do for his son, so tonight he is giving Cody a title shot against Randy Orton. And The Dream will be in his son’s corner, with John Cena as the special referee.

Randy Orton can’t be happy as he walks to the ring. Orton calls Rhodes jealous because Cody looks up to him, and not his father. Orton wants one reason not to kick The Dream in the head.

Cody joins the party to defend the old man. He says he cannot and will not pass up this golden opportunity. Orton thinks the fix in, and Dusty agrees with him.

Match #1 – Kelly Kelly vs. Gail Kim vs. Beth Phoenix vs. Jillian Hall vs. Rosa Mendes vs. Alicia Fox - Six Diva Battle Royal – Number One contender Match

The winner of this match will take on Mickie James later in the show for the Diva’s Championship. Beth Phoenix wins by knocking Gail Kim off the apron, after Kim had pulled Jillian from the ring with a head scissors.

Winner: Beth Phoenix

Match #2 – Chris Jericho vs. MVP

Jericho takes MVP to the mat, and kicks him in the head. Jericho follows with a back suplex. MVP recovers, hitting a clothesline. Jericho counters a knee to the face, but just can’t quite get the Walls of Jericho over. MVP punches his way out and then connects on a big boot. Jericho sidesteps a charge in the corner, and MVP is hung up on the rope. Jericho connects with a springboard drop kick, and MVP hits the floor.

After the break, MVP whips Jericho into the corner, but runs into a boot. MVP counters Jericho flying off the top rope with a punch to the gut. Jericho recovers and hits a bulldog, but misses the lionsault. MVP connects with a low drop kick, and follows with the Ballin’ elbow. Jericho kicks out, though. Jericho counters the Playmaker into the Walls, but MVP rolls though into a small package. Jericho kicks out, and immediately hits the CodeBreaker. Jericho covers for the win.

Winner via pinfall: Chris Jericho

DX stops by to visit with Dusty Rhodes. Hunter says Legacy is a disgrace. Dusty says he will give a title shot to one of them if Cody wins. Shawn and Hunter argue about who gets the shot. DX then plugs the Rise and Fall of WCW DVD, and some others, too.

Hornswoggle is in the back dressed like a cowboy.

Match #3 – Hornswoggle vs. Chavo Guerrero – Texas Bull Rope Match

I’m done with this match-up. Even Saturday Night Live doesn’t trot out the same premise for a sketch every week. If you care, the twist here is that Chavo is being forced to wear a cow costume. (Seriously, who did Chavo tick off? Did he kick Vince’s dog or something?) Hornswoggle wins again, this time with some help from Evan Bourne.

Winner: Hornswoggle

Match #4 – The Big Show vs. Mark Henry

Show and Henry lock up, and the World’s Strongest Man shoves Show away. Both men trade head butts, and Show drops to a knee. Henry counters a slap in the corner, and then slaps on a head lock. Show breaks the hold by getting to the ropes. Show shoots off the ropes, spearing Henry. Mark recovers and splashes Show in the corner. Henry knocks Show to the mat, but cannot get the cover. Show then exposes a turnbuckle, and slams Henry into face first. Show is disqualified, but still knocks Henry out with the big right after the bell.

Winner via DQ: The Big Show

Back in the locker room, Ted asks Cody if he is ready. Orton can’t believe Cody is still going through with this. He tells Rhodes whatever happens out there is just business.

DX and Dusty are still watching the WCW DVD. DX asks Dusty how he could let something like that happen. They then argue what was better WCW or WWE during the Monday Night Wars.

Match #5 – Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger vs. The Miz vs. Carlito – Fatal Four-way United States Title Match

Kofi plants Swagger with a drop kick and then mounts Carlito in the corner. The Miz finally gets involved, breaking up a pin by Carlito. Kofi leap frogs Carlito, who is then back dropped onto Swagger by Carlito. Kofi knocks Miz from the ring, and then leaps over the top rope onto all three men on the outside.

After the break, Swagger has Kofi in a single leg submission. The Miz breaks the hold with a knee to the chin and follows with a neckbreaker. Kofi breaks the pin. Carlito cuts Miz off with a missile drop kick. Kofi leaps off the top rope to take out Carlito and Miz. Swagger knocks all three men down, and then splashes on Carlito, but cannot get the pin. He goes for the splash on Miz, but Miz gets the knee up. Kofi hits the mood drop on Carlito. The Miz hits the Finale on Swagger, only to have Carlito hit him with a backstabber. Before he can make the pin, Kofi hits Trouble in Paradise on Carlito and covers for the pin to retain his belt.

Winner via pinfall: Kofi Kingson

Match #6 – Mickie James vs. Beth Phoenix – WWE Diva’s Championship Match

Mickie is shot off the ropes, but counters with a DDT. Mickie covers for the win.

Winner via pinfall: Mickie James

Hunter, Shawn, and Dusty are still talking WCW. Hunter wants to know if the Shockmaster is on the DVD. Shawn doesn’t know who that is, so Hunter explains. But instead Shawn gets a live demonstration with Arn Anderson as the voice of the Shockmaster, and Santino under the mask. (If you have no idea what I’m talking about, go to Youtube and search for Shockmaster. This may be the single worst moment in WCW history.)

Josh Matthews interviews John Cena, wanting to know if tonight WWE can avoid another controversial ending. Cena says he does control the fate of the WWE Title, and tonight could be the collapse of Legacy as we know it. Cena says he will not choose sides. He’s going to call it right down the middle. Cena says he will now quit at Breaking Point in two weeks. Cena guarantees victory at Breaking Point.

Next week, Bob Barker will host Monday Night Raw! No, really!

Match #7 – Randy Orton vs. Cody Rhodes w/ Dusty Rhodes – Special Guest Referee John Cena – WWE Title Match

John Cena hits the ring, and Dusty grabs a microphone. He tells Cena he is sorry, as Orton and Cody attack. DiBiase hits the ring, and hits Dream Street on Cena. Legacy puts the boots to Cena, when DX makes the save. Hunter goes for a Pedigree on Cody, when Dusty clocks him with a cowboy boot. Shawn Michaels is overwhelmed by the numbers and is laid out. Dusty and Cody hug, and Orton turns to celebrate with Dusty. Instead Orton lays him out with an RKO. Cody is confused as his mentor has taken out his father, and the show fades to black.

No Contest

Dale Plummer has been writing for SLAM! Wrestling since 2003.