July 7, 2009
Raw: A Million Dollar edition
By MATT BISHOP - SLAM! Wrestling
Tonight on Monday Night Raw: The Night of Champions Tournament concludes with a WrestleMania 22 main event rematch between Triple H and John Cena. And after a rough week last week, what's in store for Legacy with "The Million Dollar Man" Ted DiBiase as the show's guest host? Should be a good one!
And we are TAPED! from San Jose, Calif. Michael Cole and 2007 WWE Hall of Famer Jerry Lawler are our hosts. This show is presented in WWEHD (TV-PG,V).
Our guest host for this week "The Million Dollar Man" Ted DiBiase is introduced and comes out flanked by his son Ted and Cody Rhodes. He says tonight he's going to have some fun. Although there can't be any title matches before Night of Champions, he books Legacy to face Edge and Chris Jericho for the Unified Tag Team Championship at Night of Champions.
Ted asks Cody how it felt when Mark Henry beat Randy Orton last week. Cody says it didn't feel good. So he books Henry against Rhodes for tonight. Junior asks him what he's doing. Senior then talks about Junior's issue with Orton at The Bash. Senior says Orton is just holding Junior down and that Orton is using him. So tonight, Junior will face Orton. Junior says he can't do this. Senior says not only is he going to face him, he's going to beat him.
Senior takes off and the Unified Tag Team Champions make their way to the ring. They have a staredown in the middle of the ring and coming up next, the champs will face the Colons in a "final rematch."
Match #1 - Edge (Toronto, Ontario) & Chris Jericho (Winnipeg, Manitoba) vs. The Colons (The Caribbean)
The champs work over Carlito for a while until Primo gets the tag. Primo comes in and gets a quick two count on Edge. He goes for a springboard but is pushed down by Edge. Edge ties Primo up in the ropes but Carlito comes and frees him. Edge comes off the ropes at Primo, but he moves and Edge knocks Carlito off the apron onto the floor. Primo tries to capitalize with a roll-up but Edge kicks out at two.
Carlito comes back in to get at Edge, but the referee admonishes Carlito. With the ref's back turned, Jericho comes in and nails Primo with the Codebreaker. He stumbles right into a spear from Edge. Good night, Irene.
Winners via pinfall: Edge & Chris Jericho
Carlito is upset, to say the least. Carlito is pacing around the ring and then attacks Primo, throwing him shoulder-first into the post. He throws him out of the ring and beats him up on the ground and then throws him into the announce table. Carlito walks off as Primo is left laying.
Rhodes and Junior are backstage talking. Orton comes in and asks Junior what he's going to do. He says he can't really do anything. Orton says it won't accomplish anything for Junior to lose to Orton on television. Junior is indignant. Orton tells him to go to his dad and make him change it and if it were his father, but DiBiase cuts him off right there and says his dad is way better than Orton's and he's going to beat him.
Match #2 - Maryse (Montreal, Quebec) & Alicia Fox (Jacksonville, Fla.) vs. Mickie James (Richmond, Va.) & Gail Kim (Toronto, Ontario)
Gail Kim and Alicia Fox battle, but with Kim against the ropes, Maryse nails a big kick from the apron that gets a two count for Fox.
Maryse tags in and hits a backbreaker. She throws Kim into the corner, but Kim moves as Maryse follows her in. Kim goes for the tag, but Maryse recovers enough to knock James off the apron. She goes for an Irish whip, but Kim reverses it into her finisher.
Winners via pinfall: Gail Kim & Mickie James
DiBiase is getting his fingernails worked on backstage when Rhodes comes in. Rhodes is trying to get out of match with Henry, saying he should focus on the title match at Night of Champions. They get into a discussion about Dusty Rhodes, with Cody starting to sing Dusty's theme (hilarious) when DiBiase tells him he despises Dusty. What in the world would the Million Dollar Man want to have to do with a common man, he asks. He's also upset that that "fat, blond-headed, bloated, gyrating fool" is in the Hall of Fame and he's not is a travesty. He says if Cody doesn't get out of his office, he's going to put him in polka dots, just like his old man.
Match #3 - Cody Rhodes (Charlotte, N.C.) vs. Mark Henry (Silsbee, Texas)
Henry goes for a splash in the corner but Rhodes gets his feet up. Rhodes goes to the second rope and jumps off right into the World's Strongest Slam. Somehow, Rhodes is able to roll out of the ring. He's had enough and heads for higher ground.
Winner via countout: Mark Henry
Match #4 - Randy Orton (St. Louis, MO) vs. Ted DiBiase (West Palm Beach, Fla.)
Following a break, Orton has applied a Level 4 Randy Orton Chinlock. He took advantage by throwing DiBiase into the steel steps. Orton starts with a Garvin Stomp. Orton hits the middle rope DDT and signals to the referee to count, as he expects it to be over. DiBiase kicks out, though. An incensed Orton covers again and again DiBiase kicks out. Orton pounds away and then lands a "vintage" knee drop.
He then applies a vintage chinlock. DiBiase gets up and hits a back suplex. Orton runs right into an elbow and DiBiase comes off the middle rope with a flying clothesline for a two count. DiBiase gets too aggressive and Orton hits his backbreaker and then "the viper slithers into his coiling position," which is Cole-speak for getting ready for the RKO. Orton goes for it, but DiBiase counters into a backslide for a very long two count. Orton comes off the ropes but right into a scoop slam for another long two.
DiBiase reverses an Irish whip and goes for Dream Street, but Orton rolls him off his back. DiBiase comes charging back but runs right into the RKO.
Winner via pinfall: Randy Orton
Not to editorialize too much here, but that is how you do a match to get young talent over. Not to mention it was a great television match, but it also made you want to see the eventual feud between these two. Following that match, I can honestly see DiBiase beating Orton for the championship at some point in the future.
Josh Mathews catches up with Triple H backstage and Triple H says that if you're looking for epic, you need go no further than he and John Cena in the ring together. He doesn't care what he has to go through to get what he wants, and that includes John Cena.
MVP is in the ring for another edition of the VIP Lounge. His guest tonight is one of Raw's newest acquisitions, former ECW Champion Jack Swagger.
MVP asks Swagger how it feels to be exposed as a fraud in his Raw debut by being counted out against Orton.
Swagger says he is a two-time All-American at the University of Oklahoma. He asks MVP if he knows what that means. MVP chimes in that it means he couldn't get into a better school. Swagger says MVP spent time at Florida State, but not the university. He's a fraud, a con because he spent 10 years behind bars. Swagger says he's never received a parking ticket. The only thing MVP's ever been MVP of was a prison basketball league. If anyone's an MVP on Raw, it's Swagger.
MVP gives the feel good speech about turning his life around. MVP says there's another big difference between the two -- he's never been afraid of a fight. The crowd starts chanting for MVP as Swagger slowly backs away from the nose-to-nose staredown. Swagger says he doesn't fight people below him and most of all, he doesn't fight criminals. MVP says if Swagger ever feels like fighting, he can find him in the VIP Lounge.
The DiBiase clan is backstage. Senior tells Junior one day he'll be WWE Champion. Junior isn't too happy, saying he was set up to fail, put in an impossible situation, that's it's still all about Senior, that Senior came to steal his spotlight. Senior says it's not like that at all, but Junior says yes, it is and gives him one of the hardest slaps seen on WWE television in quite some time.
Match #5 - Kofi Kingston (Jamaica) vs. Evan Bourne (St. Louis, MO)
Jamaican me crazy!
Bourne misses a kick and Kofi turns it into a half-crab. He lets it go and Bourne hits a side takeover. He goes for another backslide but no dice. Bourne whips Kofi into the corner, but Kofi comes off with a crossbody for two. Kofi hits a dropkick and corner splash. He sends Bourne to the other corner and charges at him, but Bourne jumps up with a double knee to the face. Kofi is down and Bourne climbs the ropes and lands the Shooting Star Press to pick up the win.
Winner via pinfall: Evan Bourne
Bourne helps Kingston to his feet when the Big Show's music hits. Cole echoes the sentiments of everyone by indignantly saying, "NOW WHAT?!".
Show goes after Kingston and destroys him. Bourne tries to help out Kofi but Show just throws him clear across the ring twice. He goes back to Kofi for a bit. He sees Bourne getting up and spears him dead, leaving Bourne laying on the bottom rope. He beats up Kofi some more and locks in the camel clutch backbreaker. That was a whoopin'.
Match #6 - Night of Champions Tournament Final - Triple H (Greenwich, Ct.) vs. John Cena (West Newbury, Mass.)
They stare off for an extended period of time, as the announcers are billing this as one of the greatest Raw main events of all time.
Triple H goes to work on Cena's back. Cena gets up an hits two shoulderblocks and the backdrop. He hits the Five-Knuckle Shuffle and calls for the Attitude Adjustment but Triple H slides out. Cena runs right into the spinebuster and HHH lines him up for the Pedigree but Cena backdrops his way out of it. Triple H locks in a sleeper. Cena powers out and locks in a sleeper of his own.
Triple H rises up and hits a back suplex as the referee starts to count them both out. Cena gets up at seven while Triple H rises at eight. They then start a "boo/yay" punch exchange with Cena getting the boos.
Triple H gets Cena reeling before he explodes with a bulldog. He goes for a guillotine legdrop but Triple H moves out of the way. HHH goes for the Pedigree again but Cena drops him down and rolls through for two. He goes for the Attitude Adjustment but Triple H gets out. Cena hits a drop-toe hold and locks in the STF but Triple H is too close to the ropes.
Triple H goes for the Pedigree again but Cena pulls his feet out from under him again and slingshots him into the post. He lifts him up for the Attitude Adjustment but HHH hangs onto the ropes. He gets out and they hit a double clothesline.
The referee starts counting again and they both rise at nine. They start punching again when DiBiase and Rhodes hit the ring to attack. They quickly scatter. The referee calls for the bell.
This match is a double disqualification
Orton comes out and says since there is no winner he won't be facing either of them at Night of Champions. Before he's even finished spitting it out, Ted DiBiase comes out and says that neither one of them lost. So since he has the power, at Night of Champions it will be a triple threat match with Orton defending against Cena and Triple H.
Matt Bishop can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org. Please include your name and hometown. Click here to follow Matt on Twitter. And if you're interested in mixed martial arts, check out Matt's weekly podcast -- Lights Out Radio. Should be a good one!.