April 5, 2009
Wrestlemania 25 -- the live report
Greg: Everyone's out of here. Time to clean up.
Greg: LAME finish. No emotional build. Triple H pedigreed Orton, who was out from the sledgehammer hit. No run ins, no nothing. Blecch.
Greg: HHH just hit Orton with the 'hammer, but the ref didn't see it. What a good guy.
Greg: Orton has the sledgehammer. But HHH punted Orton.
Greg: Pretty dramatic, if methodical match, so far. Orton's facials might be the best ever. Orton just dropped HHH after a ref (Scott Armstrong) bump.
Greg: We've less than 5 minutes in and we've already seen an RKO out of nowhere and a pedigree. Crowd seems tired or subdued.
Greg: Shake and bake tan on Randy Orton. He looks orange.
HHH-Orton up next.
Just in case you missed, Undertaker is 17-0, defeating HBK in a nice match.
The official attendance is announced: 72,744.
Steve and JR bless another brew, for old time's sake. Austin is wearing the classic 3:16 shirt to boot.
The 2009 Hall of Fame inductees are re-announced, with Stone Cold, taking it upon himself to drive around the ring in his ATV. Looks like he's done this before..
Kenai: That was an average match, with some nice spots. A good break for the crowd to rest from the Taker-HBK match before it.
Wrestlemania 26 will be held in Phoenix Arizona, March 28 2010, according to the promo.
And Cena takes it FUing Edge onto Show for the duke. Cena leaves as the World Heavuweight Champ.
Kenai: Even it was for a brief moment, Cena hoisting Show and Edge on his back, was impressive.
Greg: Highlights of the triple threat so far: Cena lifting Big Show, Edge spearing Big Show through the ring barricade, Vickie Guerrero took a spear off the apron ... but Chavo caught her.
Greg: Edge came out first, then Show, and an army of Cenas came out next, to line the ramp for Cena. Best entrance tonight.
Greg: Edge vs Big Show vs John Cena is next.
Andy: The end comes when HBK goes for a moonsault off the top rope. Taker catches him and plants the Tombstone for a 1-2-3. Undertaker is 17-0 at WrestleMania.
Greg: Taker is stunned. Tombstone didn't get the pin.
Greg: No! They roll into a male hug.
Greg: HBK nails Sweet Chin Music! Is it over??
Greg: Michaels just pulled Taker onto a cameraman. It looked great from the first angle. Then they showed it from a camera BEHIND the cameraman (ummm, why was HE there if the other was a real camera?) That angle looked silly, and the plant / cameraman pulled Taker onto him after the dive. And really, the footage we want is the one the camera shot that was hit. That would have added some credibility.
Greg: Taker vs HBK has been very competitive and entertaining so far. Calling it even at the moment.
Greg: You know the introductions take too long when you can go upstairs, get your son out of the tub, dry him off and kiss him goodnight, then come downstairs and the match is just starting.
Greg: Undertaker versus Michaels is up now. Should be interesting, though I don't think anyone thinks Michaels has a chance.
Laury: Michaels looks like a cheap preacher.
Andy: JBL grabs the mic after the bell and is speechless. He then screams..."I Quit!" On an unrelated note JBL looks out of shape and in need of a 'bro'.
Andy: JBL hits a vicious head kick before the bell even rings. Wow this is over quickly! The bell rings, Mysterio connects with the 619 and a top rope splash...21 seconds. Rey "Joker" Mysterio is the new Intercontinental Champion! Well this was uninteresting to begin with so at least it ended quickly
Kenai: Rey looks interesting with the joker homage. But why so serious?
JBL is great at cutting promos and this one here is no different, right in the middle of the ring.
Rey Mysterio and JBL up next.
And it's over , just like that. Matt with a sick twist of fate on Jeff, with Jeff in the chair. Everyone agrees it looked nasty.
Here come the ladders now.
Jeff puts another table on top of Matt, who is already on a table, who jumps on a ladder and dives unto Matt, smashing both tables. Neat.
Kenai: A shop-vac. Now I've seen it all.
Greg: The Hardy vs Hardy match is up next.
Laury: "Jeff Hardy's still alive. That's awesome."
Greg: Once Flair bailed, Jericho called out Mickey Rourke. Rourke milked it for all it was worth, and got into the ring, boxing. Jericho eventually started boxing as well, and Rourke clocked him in the back of the head. Jericho went down, and rolled out of the ring. Flair and Rourke paraded and celebrated.
Greg: Flair and Jericho now. Whooooo!
Greg: Small package, but it's not enough for Steamboat! Shortly thereafter Jericho won with his codebreaker. We're not worthy, Dragon, we're not worthy.
Greg: Steamer rules -- though they cut away from his Skin the Cat -- did someone help him back in the ring?
Greg: To really have brought back the past, Jesse Ventura should have been on commentary.
Greg: Grandpa Snuka was out first. Then Piper was eliminated. Steamboat -- who looks great -- did a top rope crossbody onto Jericho, but just got two.
Greg: Apparently Jericho is afflicted with narcissism, says J.R.
Andy: Mickey Rourke is in the audience...he's wearing a cowboy hat and looks like Kid Rock's father!
Greg: They are running a long video on The Wrestler with quotes from Mickey Rourke and Jericho's bad attitude towards the oldtimers. Guess that match is next.
Greg: It was a waste bringing in the oldtimers. What did Sunny look like? Molly Holly? Who else was even in there? Weird.
Greg: Santino -- er "Santina" won, though the King & Ross pretended throughout they didn't know who he was. He dumped Phoenix & Melina. King: "The first diva I've ever seen with a 5 o'clock shadow."
Greg: The Miss Wrestlemania match is on now. Mae Young is timekeeper. Santino is in a wig. They didn't introduce ANY of them, claiming that they just started fighting before the intros.
Greg: For the FIFTH song, the divas started parading / table dancing down past Kid Rock. So at least we don't get intro music for each of the 25 divas, thankfully.
Greg: Four songs now. I didn't pay for this, WWE.
Greg: They have dropped Colons vs Miz & Morrison, apparently, and yet we get THREE Kid Rock lame songs??? How does that work? Is someone injured backstage and unable to perform? Maybe Rey Rey had to go pee.
Greg: Kid Rock is on. Talk about killing the momentum.
Greg: Andy McNamara is here now to help us ID the Smackdown guys.
Kenai: Not a bad opening match
Kenai: You're bang on Laury!
Laury: The Obama factor is at play here: The most black men in a match that I can recall
Kenai: The boys laying it out there. Bodies flying everywhere.
Nice catch of Kofi by Henry, who promptly smashes him into the ladder.
Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, and Jim Ross are the announcing team for tonight.
Man, Mark Henry almost came off the top rope! Now Hornswaggle has a miniladder and he just jumped onto everybody. "That was lovely" says Laury.
Show is underway with the Money in the Bank. Punk is out first. So much for Mysterio supposedly telling us he'd be out first.
Greg: Kenai just said "Nice visual" for the chicky singing. Should I know who she is?
GREG OLIVER: I'm wearing a Frank Gotch t-shirt. How many other people can say that who are watching Mania? How many would even know who Gotch is??
Kenai: I can't believe it. Greg called it. CM Punk takes the cake - again.
Later tonight / Monday, here's what to expect:
Dale Plummer comes out of self-imposed purgatory to recap the show on PPV as only Dale can.
Down in Houston, ace photographer Mike Mastrandrea will be shooting as best he can from wherever he is positioned in the stadium. And if you haven't already checked out Mike's wicked shots from the WWE Hall of Fame, Fan Axxess, Ring of Honor and Booker T's event, shame on you! (Access -- note the proper spelling -- them at Wrestlemania 25 photo galleries.)
Nick Tylwalk will be filing stories for Mondays Sun newspapers as well as a "man on the scene" report from Reliant Stadium.
As for "Bloodthirsty" Bob Kapur, well, we're not sure what to expect. His "Twittering" report from Saturday's festivities was a little off-beat, to say the least. No doubt there is more on the way. He'll be in Houston for Raw on Monday and will likely visit with a few Houston-area oldtimers as well for future features on SLAM! Wrestling.
Got all that? We're tired just typing it out!