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COMMENT





Impact: Bad dates and Sting's return
By BRYAN SOKOL - For SLAM! Wrestling


On last week's edition of Impact, it ended with Booker T and Kevin Nash being separated by security. What will happen on this edition of Impact. Will Booker get into the head of Kevin Nash? What else will happen on Impact that could effect the July 13 Victory Road pay per view?

Impact starts out in the ring with Team 3D, AJ Styles, Rhino, and Karen Angle. Styles called out Kurt Angle, but instead Team 3D came out. Ray then told off Karen Angle. He also said that the whole problem in all of this was Karen Angle. After everything was said Styles went to the attack on 3D. Styles and Rhino then challenged 3D and Kurt Angle to a Full Metal Mayhem match at Victory Road.

1st Blind Date - Kurt Angle meets his first date, Tiffany, at the gym and did not seem happy that he was dating a Human Medicine Ball.

Backstage - LAX and Hector Guerrero are backstage talking about their match with Beer Money Inc. at Victory Road. Guerrero then says that it will be a Fans' Revenge Strap Match.

Match 1- Tag Team Match - The Motor City Machine Guns (Alex Shelley & Chris Sabin) vs. Beer Money Inc. (James Storm & Rhino) with Jackie Moore

The Motor City Machine Guns start out on the offense. The Guns win via pinfall with an upset victory. Beer Money Inc. were upset with the outcome and proceeded to handcuff the Guns to the corners and whipped them with straps. The officials came out to stop the attack but they also were whipped by Beer Money Inc. Beer Money Inc. also turned their attention to David Penzer, TNA’s ring announcer, and whipped him. TNA’s commissioner Jim Cornette came out and told Beer Money Inc. that later on they will wrestle the two most angry wrestlers in the entire TNA locker room, Samoa Joe and Kevin Nash.

Winners- The Motor City Machine Guns (Pinfall)

Blind Date 2, Dinner Date - Kurt told his blind date about all of his accomplishments and how he was a gold medalist in the 1996 Olympics, and how he is not in the greatest of hopes with Karen Angle. He did not notice that the blind date was a man! Jeremy Borash was the person to tell Kurt he was a man.

Match 2- Knockouts Bimbo Brawl- Moose vs. Roxxi Laveaux

This match began with Moose in control and nothing really changed as this match was fast and brutal. By the end of the match Roxxi was bloody. This was Moose’s second victory in a row in a Bimbo Brawl match.

Winner- Moose (Pinfall)

Backstage, Kevin Nash, Jim Cornette, and Jeremy Borash were shown, and Cornette breaks through to Nash about him teaming with Samoa Joe to wrestle Beer Money Inc. Nash then came back by saying, "good luck telling Joe."

Joe was angry about hearing the news that he will be forced to team with Nash in the main event in this edition of Impact. Cornette then told Joe that he will have no choice and he will have to team up with Kevin Nash in tonight’s main event versus Beer Money Inc.

Blind Date 3, Dinner Date - Kurt could not stop talking about himself. The one flaw that Kurt saw in her was that she kept leaving the table. Angle was mad that he thought she was vomiting out the food that he was paying for. She said that she had a medical condition but Kurt nor Jeremy Borash cared about and made fun of her until she stormed away. Kurt said he was very mad and that he would kill Brother Ray the next time that Angle saw him.

Match 3 - World X Cup Round 2 - Rey Bucanero (Team Mexico) vs. Alex Koslov (Team International)

An overall quick match with not much to talk about. Standings:
Team Mexico- 3
Team TNA- 1
Team International-0
Team Japan- 0

Winner- Rey Bucanero (Team Mexico) (Pinfall)

Backstage, Angle said that he was very angry with Brother Ray and will beat him up as soon as he sees him. Angle was angry and looked like he would hurt Brother Ray.

Kurt Angle is in the ring, and he is looking for Brother Ray. He cuts a promo about how Brother Ray set him up on three awful blind dates, which he described as Horton Hears A Who, Cloverfield, and a girl with "problems." Brother Ray cut him off and proceeded to talk about their tag match versus Christian Cage, AJ Styles, and Rhino. Brother Ray tried to calm Kurt Angle down by telling him the story about the little black book and how Brother Ray lost it and took Brother Devon’s book. Brother Ray describes a girl he met and saved for Kurt. He then introduces Ivory Snow. Angle looked at this girl and hit on her. She said she is loving, likes having fun, and is loyal. Angle then called her a liar and took his anger with Karen Angle out on Ivory by yelling at her. He stopped himself before getting physical, explaining that he would never touch a woman -- but he knew two girls that would -- Angelina Love and Velvet Sky. As the Beautiful People begin the attack, Karen Angle came out for the save. While Kurt Angle is threatening to attack, Gail Kim, ODB, AJ Styles, and Rhino make the save and clear the ring.

As we go to commercial, Mike Tenay announces that we will be back with the next edition of Pimp My Dressing Room with Booker T.

Booker T is shown talking to Jeremy Borash. They both take a seat on the couch. Booker then talks about how Samoa Joe is forced to team up with Kevin Nash. He then talks about how he has everything except the TNA World Title.

A plug is shown about how Booker T will go against Samoa Joe for the TNA World Championship at Victory Road in Booker's hometown of Houston, Texas.

TNA returns with the story on how Matt Morgan started. He says that is met his mentor Jim Cornette in Ohio Valley Wrestling. He talked about his first WWE match which was a tag team match. Angle and Cornette agree that he was misused.

Match 4- World X Cup Round 2 match- Milano Collection AT of team Japan vs. Curry Man of team TNA

Curry Man starts out on the offense with a dropkick. Milano Collection AT then attempts a pinfall but does not succeed. Curry Man gets on the offense again. Curry Man hits the flying hip attack but waits too long. Pinfall attempt, but Milano gets out and hits a super kick, for a two count. Curry Man ascends to the top and hits a crossbody. Milano hits a backflip for the win.

Winner- Milano Collection AT (Pinfall)

Updated Standings:
Team Mexico-4
Team TNA-1
Team Japan-1
Team International-0

Lauren is backstage with James Storm and Robert Roode. They both talk about what they will do and have done as a tag team. Storm finishes off with his trademark "sorry about your damn luck." Roode then finishes out the promo by saying that they will defeat Nash and Joe in the main event of this edition of Impact as we go to commercial.

Match 5- Knockout Challenge Match- Raisha Saeed with Awesome Kong vs. Taylor

Saeed starts out with a slam but gets reversed. Saeed gets back on the offense and while Taylor goes to the top, Saeed hits Taylor in the ribs. Kong gets involved and gives Saeed an easier match. Saeed gives Taylor a back suplex. Saeed misses a Backflip. Taylor moves out of the way and gets a cover for a two count. Taylor is on the offense and hits a suplex for the three count, the victory and a rematch with Kong.

Winner- Taylor (Pinfall)

As we go to commercial, the only remaining question is, Can Joe and Nash co-exist for a victory? We return with a promo of Gail Kim talking about winning the first Knockout Championship. Promo then glances to Angelina Love who says she wants to soon become Knockout champion.

Match 6- Main Event- Beer Money (James Storm and Robert Roode) with Jackie Moore vs. Kevin Nash and Samoa Joe

Beer Money enters the ring first followed by Kevin Nash and then the TNA World Champion Samoa Joe. Nash starts out backing Roode into a corner. Roode reverses the attack and now Nash is in the corner and Roode is on the attack. Nash then gives Roode a sidewalk slam. Nash then whips Roode into another corner. Joe tags himself in. Roode then attacks Joe as he tags in Storm. Joe gives Storm a kick in the head as we go to commercial. As we return, Joe is being beat down by James Storm. Joe then comes up with punches on Storm but not for long as Storm returns with more offence. Joe snap slams Storm. Instead of tagging in Nash he gives him a one-finger salute. As Joe turns around he gets attacked by Roode. Roode attempts the Payoff but misses. Joe then attempts a Muscle Buster but Roode gets out. Joe gets Roode up for another attempt at the Muscle Buster for the victory.

Winners- Samoa Joe and Kevin Nash (Pinfall)

After the match Joe and Nash exchange looks until Sting's music plays. Cameras are looking everywhere until we see him in the rafters. Tenay ends the show by asking the viewers of Impact why Sting chose to return tonight. What will happen on next week's TNA Impact? We will just have to wait and see. Will Sting break his silence?

This is Bryan Sokol's debut piece for SLAM! Wrestling, following in the footsteps of his big brother Chris Sokol.