ECW: Even Cutting Edge can't save weak show
MATT BISHOP - SLAM! Wrestling
Tonight on ECW on Sci-Fi: Week two of the Mike Adamle era commences.
Should be a good one?
And we are LIVE! from Greensboro, N.C. Mike Adamle and Tazz are our hosts
(how weird is that to say?) and this show is presented in WWEHD
Coming up tonight, Kane joins Edge for a special edition of The Cutting
Match #1 - Kelly Kelly (Jacksonville, Fla.) & Tommy Dreamer (Yonkers,
N.Y.) vs. Layla (Miami, Fla.) & Mike Knox (Phoenix, Ariz.)
This one has five-star classic written all over it.
Kelly Kelly hits the Fameasser on Layla for the win. Too short to even
recap, or care about, for that matter..
Winners via pinfall: Kelly Kelly & Tommy Dreamer
Ever the sore loser, Knox comes in and hits the corkscrew faceplant on
(Ads -- Philadelphia has just defeated Washington in overtime. Over on
Hockey Night in Canada, a guy is playing both the Canadian and American
national anthems on his saxophone. Honestly, this is awesome.)
They replay the speeches from the American presidential hopefuls. I
missed these on RAW last night because I forgot to set my DVD recorder to
the correct channel. I chuckled.
Match #2 - John Morrison (Los Angeles, Calif.) vs. Jimmy Wang Yang
The Miz comes on commentary and almost immediately makes fun of Adamle,
asking if Yang is "Jamaicain me crazy." Adamle then proceeds to botch Jimmy
Wang Yang's name.
I guess I should recap the match. Yang hits a huge flying monkey flip.
Morrison recovers and goes for a split-leg corkscrew moonsault but Yang
moves and hits a moonsault of his own for the pin.
Winner via pinfall: Jimmy Wang Yang
Coming up tonight: The Cutting Edge with ECW Champion Kane.
Backstage, Kofi Kingston chats with Shelton Benjamin, who preview their
match tonight. Kofi is all nice and Shelton tells him his undefeated streak
(Ads -- San Jose has just taken a 1-0 lead on a nice goal by Joe
Still to come, The Cutting Edge with Kane.
Match #3 - Kofi Kingston (Jamaica) vs. Shelton Benjamin (Orangeburg,
Pretty much the second Kofi's music starts, Tazz yells out: "Jamaicain me
crazy!!" and begs Adamle to say it. I laughed.
The two start with some chain wrestling but Shelton puts an end to that
with a nice shoulderbreaker, the likes of which I haven't seen in some
Shelton tries to capitalize with an armbar but Kofi escapes but it
doesn't last long as Shelton hits a flying armbar to put Kofi down
Shelton goes to the top for something, but Kingston dropkicks him right
out of the air. Again, it doesn't last long, as Benjamin recovers and locks
in another armbar.
Shelton's power appears to be too much for Kofi so far, here. Benjamin's
attack is "damn near criminal," according to Tazz.
But then just as quickly as it was going badly for Kingston, he hits the
Trouble in Paradise out of nowhere for the win.
Winner via pinfall: Kofi Kingston
Match #4 - Mark Henry (Silsbee, Texas) vs. Nunzio (Rockland County,
The two are staring each other down in the middle of the ring when they
come back from the RAW Rebound.
Oh, yeah, Henry beats on Nunzio before hitting the World's Strongest Slam
for the win.
Winner via pinfall: Mark Henry
This is a barnburner of an episode thus far.
Maybe it can be saved, though, as The Cutting Edge is next.
The former World Heavyweight Champion is out, flanked by Curt Hawkins and
Zack Ryder, for The Cutting Edge.
Edge stands in the middle of the ring to a chorus of boos. He brings out
his guest, the ECW Champion -- Kane.
Edge invites Kane to have a seat, he chooses not to, so Edge stands up,
Edge informs Kane that Kane's life sucks. He goes over Kane's history and
their history together, bringing up the whole Lita saga.
This is honestly the worst tripe I've heard in a while. They are saying
nothing new whatsoever. It's disappointing to me because I love Edge so
much. Kane is just so awful right now.
Finally they start to pump up Backlash a little bit when Kane attacks
Edge, but then Chavo Guerrero and his buddy join the party and Edge gives
Chavo a chair. The other four grab a limb to hold Kane to the mat as Chavo
pulls back and goes to town with the chair on Kane's left knee.
Chavo then goes back with the bent chair and nails him once more for good
That's all she wrote, folks. Go Wings!
Send Matt e-mail about ECW, wrestling, MMA or hockey at firstname.lastname@example.org. Please include your
name and hometown. And if you're interested in mixed martial arts, check out
Matt's weekly podcast -- Lights Out
Radio. Should be a good one!.