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ECW: Kane and Big Daddy V get extreme
By
MATT BISHOP - SLAM! Wrestling
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Tonight on ECW on Sci-FI, it's "a night of beauties and beasts" as
Kelly
Kelly battles Layla and the feud that won't die continues as Big Daddy
V
meets Kane yet again, but this time it's under EXTREME RULES! Should be
a
good one!
And we are LIVE! from Roanoke, Virginia where I went to an extremely
poorly attended edition of Smackdown!/ECW back in June 2006.
Match #1 - Kelly Kelly (Jacksonville, Fla.) vs. Layla (Miami,
Fla.)
To say this was awful would be a libelous insult to every single awful
match
that ever existed. After about 60 seconds of tepid action and blown
spots,
Balls Mahoney comes out, distracts Layla then Kelly attempts a back
handspring elbow thingy that didn't even end up in the same area code
as
Layla and then just throws her down, grabs her legs and rolls through
for a
pin.
Winner via pinfall: Kelly Kelly
Words just cannot express how God-awful that was. Although I cannot
say
I've seen every episode of ECW on Sci-Fi, I'd assume that this has to
be one
of the top-3 worst matches in the history of the show. That was the
worst
match I've seen since I started here.
Up next: The WWE Tag Team Champions John Morrison and The Miz
(HOO-RAH!)
battle Jesse and Festus!
(Ads)
Match #2 - John Morrison (Los Angeles, Calif.) & The Miz
(Cleveland,
Ohio) vs. Jesse & Festus (Parts Unknown)
I'm not gonna lie, Jesse & Festus are slowly becoming one of my
favorite
teams. Then you have Morrison and Miz, two of my perpetual favorites.
Suffice to say, I'm excited for this match.
Morrison and Jesse start and Jesse gets a quick tag to Festus.
Morrison
goes to tag in his partner but Miz is nowhere to be found. Once Jesse
gets
back in, Miz gladly comes back. Morrison and Miz get dumped outside the
ring
where Jesse splashes onto both of them. With the champs down and out,
it's a
perfect time for some...
(Ads)
We're back and Miz and Morrison are firmly in control and stay that
way
for a while, working over Jesse with a multitude of things. The champs
are
working together extremely well. Jesse continues to be isolated while
Festus
is jumping up and down trying to get a tag but Jesse is nowhere near
him as
they have cut the ring in half. Jesse tries to fire up but Morrison
drops
him with one of my favorite moves a Drop Toe Hold. But it doesn't last
much
longer as a miscue allows Festus to get the hot tag.
Festus is the proverbial House O' Fire, dominating the champs.
Festus
tags Jesse back in and launches him into Miz, but Morrison makes the
save.
Festus knocks Morrison out of the ring but Miz makes it to his feet and
takes Jesse to the ropes where Morrison, with the referee's back
turned,
drops Jesse's throat on the rope and sends him flying backward to Miz
for a
cradle pin.
Winners via pinfall: John Morrison and The Miz
Wow. That match was everything that the first match wasn't. A good,
if
not great, tag team match. They're back on the plus side of things for
this
show.
(Ads)
Back from break and they make me relive the horror that was the
opening
of the show. Save me.
In the ring is Elijah Burke and he once again brings out "his
homeboy"
Shelton Benjamin who is dressed to compete. Shelton then gets the mic
and
addresses why he is in ECW. He says that the bar has now been raised
for ECW
and it's just a matter of time before he is the ECW Champion. He calls
himself the Gold Standard and that there's ain't no stoppin' him
naaaaaaw!
Joey Styles tells us that Shelton will be in action NEXT!
(Ads)
Match #3 - Shelton Benjamin (Orangeburg, SC) vs. Shannon Moore
(Whispering Pines, NC)
This is what appears to be your weekly ECW squash match as Benjamin
has
his way with Moore for an extended period of time. Moore gets a tiny
hope
spot but when he tries to leap into the ring from the apron, Benjamin
catches him on his shoulders, set him down and hits him still unnamed
bulldog-to-DDT move for the fall.
Winner via pinfall: Shelton Benjamin
Up next, it's our main event of the evening as Big Flabby V takes on
Kane
is an EXTREME RULES! match.
(Ads)
Match #4 - Extreme Rules Match - Big Daddy V (Harlem, NY) vs.
Kane
(Hell, Fire & Brimstone)
Big Daddy V hits Kane with a kendo stick to start us off. Kane then
grabs
a garbage can and throws it in the ring but Big Daddy V hits him with
an
object that I missed, throws him in the ring and grabs a chair but Kane
counters the chair and then hits the flying clothesline.
Kane grabs the chair and puts it around Big Daddy V's neck but not
really
because of all the fat, the chair comes up. V gets out and knocks Kane
off
the apron. V puts Kane up against the guard rail and hits a big chop.
Matt
Striker then grabs a table and throws it in the ring. Big Daddy rolls
Kane
back into the ring and sets the table up in the corner. He sets Kane up
against the table and hits his splash which was actually more of a
shoulder
block. V goes for the cover but gets two. Upset, he asks Striker to get
another table.
He sets it up but it doesn't materialize as Kane gains control and
starts
to stagger the big man. A trash can shot sends V to a knee and as Kane
is
setting up for the choke slam, Mark Henry attacks him from out of
nowhere.
Henry and Big Daddy proceed to work Kane over big time, culminating in
putting Kane through the table where V gets the pin.
Winner via pinfall: Big Daddy V
The duo admire their handiwork and we're out.
Overall, not a bad show whatsoever. It started out horribly, peaked
in
the middle and went a little bit down in the main event, but that match
was
not overly offensive. I really dig the Morrison/Miz pairing and look
forward
to seeing them in the future. The only other downside of this show was
the
lack of CM Punk, who I'd much rather see in action than Big Flabby V
and
Kane. See you next week!
Send Matt e-mail about ECW/wrestling/MMA/hockey/ at bishop20@msu.edu. Please include
your
name and hometown. And if you're interested in mixed martial arts,
check out
Matt's weekly podcast ‹ Lights Out Radio.
Should
be a good one!.
