ECW: More SmackDown presence
MATT BISHOP - SLAM! Wrestling
Tonight on ECW on Sci-Fi (now showing through 2008!): After last
altercation, Big Daddy V will challenge Kane in the Land of Extreme and
ECW and Smackdown! roster merger thickens.
First off, I would like to take this chance to thank World Wrestling
Entertainment and Sci-Fi for renewing ECW through 2008 so I can remain
gainfully employed here at SLAM!. Although I'm sure many would've loved
see ECW go the way of the dodo bird, I enjoy making money, so hurray
WWE and Sci-Fi!
And we are LIVE! from Kansas City, Mo. and right away, we start out
show with The Miz (HOO-RAH!) and Extreme Exposé.
Miz gives his thoughts on each of the other people that the fans can
for to face ECW Champion CM Punk at Cyber Sunday, including calling
Morrison a "fruitcake". Of course, with Layla and Brooke all over Miz,
Kelly is looking disgusted.
Miz then turns his attention to Kelly and runs her down for going on
date with Balls Mahoney and Miz threatens to fire her. But Miz says
he's a nice guy so he'll just teach her a lesson by making her life
miserable week after week.
Out of nowhere, Morrison makes his way to the ring, looking to
"fruity entrance" and being called a fruitcake.
Morrison says there's not an ECW fan alive that will vote for Miz.
some barbs back and forth, Morrison asks Kelly why she associates
with a loser like the Miz when she could go along with himself.
suggests that Kelly should spend time with him all night and scream
"Morrison!" which draws a slap from Kelly.
Of course, this brings out Balls, who gets double-teamed by the
egomaniacs. Once Balls is quickly thrown out of the ring, Morrison
dumps Miz out.
Then, with Morrison celebrating, CM Punk comes out of nowhere to
I didn't think one segment could combine all the ongoing ECW
in one compact place, but this one just did it. Oh wait, ECW only has
things going on right now.
Up Next: Kane vs. Big Daddy V!
Backstage, Morrison and Miz meet up with each other and engage in a
screaming match. In comes ECW General Manager Armando Estrada and he
the two will face CM Punk and Balls Mahoney in the main event tonight.
Match #1 - Kane (Hell, Fire & Brimstone) vs. Big Daddy V (Harlem,
Does anyone else feel bad for Tony Chimel? I want to know why he got
demoted from Smackdown! He's always done a good job in my mind.
Big Daddy V starts out the match no-selling all of Kane's offense
then dominates Kane from pillar to post. Standard big man offense, you
standing on his head (man, that's a tough term to use when you're not
talking about hockey!)
Back from break and Big Daddy V is still in charge, but eventually
fires up and hitting some offense. He goes to the top rope and hits the
clothesline and knocks down V before Mark Henry runs in and attacks
Winner via disqualification: Kane
Then former World Heavyweight Champion The Great Khali enters and
3-on-1 beatdown, but then the three heels start fighting each other for
right to beat up Kane. Finally, Henry takes control of the chaos, but
big boot from Kane and is stomped out of the ring.
Coming up tonight: Balls Mahoney and CM Punk vs. The Egomaniacs
In the hype for Cyber Sunday, they show a really cool video package
the Batista/Undertaker match. I enjoyed it. (I know, this paragraph was
Backstage, CM Punk and Balls Mahoney are discussing their match
The Egomaniacs but that quickly ends and the conversations turns to
date with Kelly Kelly. Of course, Punk is a perv and what's to know
happened. Balls just half-laughs and half-giggles and nods and makes
gestures and Punk tells him that is disturbing. Balls responds with
what she said." It's good to know Balls Mahoney is the Michael Scott of
Already announced for next week on a special Halloween is ECW: A
Mash Battle Royal" featuring Kane, Big Daddy V, Mark Henry and The
Khali, which Joey Styles astutely notes is over 1,600 pounds. Get the
Match #2 - Elijah Burke (Jacksonville, Fla.) vs. Nunzio (Rockland
This match is a result of last week, where Burke hung Nunzio out to
by walking out during their match against Jesse & Festus.
This one is all Burke for about the first four minutes until Nunzio
up with the Sicilian Slice and some clotheslines and the like, but he
to the top rope and gets caught, clotheslined, set up in the corner for
Elijah Express and that's all she wrote.
Winner via pinfall: Elijah Burke
It's really a shame that Burke is stuck at this spot on the card.
Hopefully he'll be one of the guys that can appear regularly on
and get some exposure there.
Backstage, The Great Khali is screaming LOUD NOISES!!! at his
interpreter. Ooooooook. That's 24 seconds of my life I'll never get
Match #3 - John Morrison (Los Angeles, Calif.) & The Miz
Ohio) vs. CM Punk (Chicago, Ill.) & Balls Mahoney (Nutley, NJ)
The biggest spot of the entire first part of the match: Balls
trying to execute a guillotine leg drop, but missing and Styles saying
Balls has great balance due to "years of surfing."
Missing this move leads to Balls being taken advantage of for quite
long time by both Morrison and Miz, but he finally gets the hot tag to
Punk comes in and takes control and the tide totally changes when
clotheslines his partner. Punk takes advantage and hits the GTS on
for the pin.
Winners via pinfall: CM Punk & Balls Mahoney
Well, another edition of ECW on Sci-Fi is in the books. A
edition, which is pretty much all you can ask for these days.
MATT'S EXTREME MAILBAG
Is WWE trying to make Big Daddy Puke the next Vader?
He does the "V" hand gesture and now they call him the
Mastodon. Why does this fat slob get this huge push? How does
Vince make him this monster killer when just a few
months ago he was a "love machine?"
--Mike Halers, West Seneca, NY
Mike ‹ Funny you would draw this comparison. I almost included
same thing in last week's report. I actually don't think Big Daddy V is
bad. He serves his purpose and is just the latest and greatest ECW
I'm sure he'll be gone sooner than later. But, man, I do miss Vader. As
as he's not drunkenly stumbling down the ramp.
Send Matt e-mail about ECW/wrestling/MMA/hockey/ at firstname.lastname@example.org. Please include
name and hometown. And if you're interested in mixed martial arts,
Matt's weekly podcast ‹ Lights Out Radio,
new show is posted every Thursday! Should be a good one!.