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COMMENT





ECW: Morrison issues challenge
By MATT MACKINDER - SLAM! Wrestling


John Morrison retained the ECW title at The Great American Bash and I sense he'll let us know about it tonight on ECW.

Ring announcer Justin Roberts introduces the champ as the "new face of extreme" and "the greatest ECW champion of all time." I beg to differ. The crowd in Fresno, Calif., seems semi-awake. Morrison hits the ring and says he's done with CM Punk and he must move on. He issues the 15 Minues of Fame challenge to anyone in the back. If they last 15 minutes in the ring, they get a future title shot. Morrison then brings out a local jobber and gets ref in the ring.

Match # 1 - John Morrison vs. ???

Morrison surprises the kid with a headbutt and then the corkscrew neckbreaker to seal the deal in 34 seconds.

Winner via pinfall: John Morrison

Morrison says that was the youngster's brush with greatness and heads to the back. I like Nitro, er, Morrison as champ.

Triple H is returning soon. Yeah, until he tears another muscle.

Match # 2 - Kevin Thorn vs. Stevie Richards

Stevie with the upset! Just kidding, right? Thorn needs a program as he's stuck wrestling guys like Richards and Tommy Dreamer, not that there's anything wrong with getting some ECW Originals some face time. I say give Stevie a push. He still has "it." The WWE listened! Richards gets out of a Crucifix attempt and pins Dracula with a backslide. Joey Styles nearly has an aneurysm.

Winner via pinfall: Stevie Richards

Next, we get a recap of the special "dance" Extreme Exposé performed for The Miz last week. My wife wishes we could go a week without seeing "these bimbos."

The Miz heads to the ring and invites Kelly Kelly, Brooke and Layla down to ringside to watch his match this week.

Match # 3 - The Miz vs. Nunzio

Again? Didn't we see this two weeks ago? Wait. Tonight's show must be a repeat. Nope. In any event, Mizanin hits Guido with a knee lift and then a reverse neckbreaker for the duke.

Winner via pinfall: The Miz

The ladies join the Miz in the ring and the fearsome foursome freak each other. Brutal. Let's just say Mick Foley can gyrate better than the Miz.

Match # 4 - Handicap Match - Big Daddy V w/ Matt Striker vs. Jimmy Bruce & Victor Caldeo

Big Vis outweighs his opponents by nearly 60 pounds. Striker joins Styles and Tazz at the broadcaster's table. Obviously, V wins by pinning Bruce on top of Caldeo after his sidewalk slam.

Winner via pinfall: Big Daddy V

Striker is just great. His teacher gimmick tops Dean Douglas by far. Don't you agree?

Match # 5 - CM Punk & Tommy Dreamer vs. John Morrison & Elijah Burke

Wow, five matches inside of an hour. Good stuff.

Where in God's name is Marcus Cor Von? He was/is the one guy Burke looks good with in the ring. And no, Sylvester Terkay didn't look good as a team with Burke.

The action spills to the floor. Cue the commercial break.

Back from break, Dreamer is controlling the flow with both Burke and the champ. Dreamer then plays the face in peril before getting the hot tag to Punk, who cleans house. Punk clobbers Morrison with a Shining Wizard and grabs Burke for the Go To Sleep that collapses Burke and finishes it.

Winners via pinfall: CM Punk & Tommy Dreamer

Wow, does Dreamer have a glaring bald spot or what? And how many more times will Burke job to Punk?

Punk and Dreamer celebrate in the ring as Morrison holds the belt up in the aisle.

'Til next week, folks. Keep those emails coming.


MACKER'S MAILBAG

(Responding to when Vince McMahon will return.)

In all honesty, I don't want Vince to come back at all.

I do, however, think that he might come back as a mystery masked wrestler, to beat up on his foes, until he is discovered.

If anybody can find Vince, it is Donald Trump, but does THE DONALD really care about finding him?

I just saw video from The Today Show from NBC and Vince has already been on TV.

Vince McMahon is a sick puppy.

STORY IS OVER AND DONE!

--Wally, Milwaukee, Wisc.



Have a beef, comment, question about ECW? Email Matt at mackindermedia@yahoo.com and your comments will be posted in Macker's Mailbag each week. Please include your name (or initials) and hometown. Submissions may be edited for grammar, spelling and punctuation, but not for content.