Smackdown: Lashley escapes the cage
ANDY McNAMARA - SLAM! Wrestling
Tonight is the "final" showdown between King Booker T and Bobby Lashley. But this time it's in a steel cage! The Cruiserweight championship is also on the line, as well as a debut of a new tag team. Roanoke, Virginia is primed, set, and ready so let's get ready for Smackdown!
Mark Henry makes his way down to the ring and is complaining about how Rey and Chavo screwed him out of the World Heavyweight Championship last week. The World's Strongest Man runs down the list of his recent victims, which include Batista, Benoit, etc. Chavo then pops out and says that nothing Henry can say will get him out of retirement. The big man then says if Eddie was still alive he'd spit on him and that was enough to make Guerrero charge. This does not end well as Henry delivers numerous powerslams, splashes, followed by Mysterio getting pounded when he tries to come in for the save. Henry is taking turns decimating both the champion and Chavo for several minutes before finally leaving them in a heap.
Match 1: Cruiserweight Championship - Gregory Helms (c) vs. Super Crazy
Super Crazy starts the match off with a great springboard dropkick following up with attacks on the outside. The cruiserweight champion rebounds quickly after hitting a hangman from the top rope. JBL refers to Helms as "champion of champions", but he doesn't look like it after Crazy scores a near fall after a standing moonsault. Out of nowhere Psicosis jumps in the ring and nails Helms to cause the DQ. Psicosis then dropkicks his former partner in the knee and the two begin brawling.
WINNER: Gregory Helms by DQ
King Booker T and Queen Sharmell demand the cancellation of tonight's steel cage match against Lashley. GM Teddy Long says "I don't give a damn" and, after more arguing, Booker and Sharmell storm out.
Match 2: The Pit Bulls (Jamie Noble & Kid Kash) vs. Bobby ? & Marty Garner
For some reason these two are now The Pit Bulls (wasn't that an old ECW team?) In any case Noble and Kash are showing major aggression and it looks good to see the stellar athletes finally able to let loose. Garner is being manhandled by Kash and Noble with vicious kicks and punches. The finish comes when a modified Doomsday Device is delivered (Garner was faced in a way that Noble turned Garner's fall into a powerbomb after the clothesline). What an impressive debut.
>b> WINNERS: The Pit Bulls
Bobby Lashley is in the locker room holding the United States title. Wow does Lashley need a manager, just imagine having a Paul Heyman-type with him to build the kid up.
Match 3: Matt Hardy vs. Finlay
While Hardy is posing for the crowd we see Finlay's leprechaun poke his head out and point to him. Following the commercials both superstars exchange blows until Finlay takes over with a hard shoulder block in the corner. The Irishman continues punishing Hardy by trapping him in the apron drape and applying a sleeper hold. Matt bounces back with a running bulldog and is able to thwart Finlay's attempt to throw him into the exposed turnbuckle. Finlay crawls under the ring and the leprechaun sucker punches Hardy. The little guy then pops out and tosses JBL a can of Guiness! After all these distaractions Finlay nails the Celtic Cross and picks up the victory.
Match 4: Ken Kennedy vs. Gunner Scott
Gunner attacks Kennedy's arm early, but the announcer wannabe recovers in a hurry. Mr. Kennedy is almost DQ'd after refusing to stop punching Scott. Gunner mounts a brief offence before Kennedy delivers the "Kenton Bomb" off the top rope and gets the 1-2-3. After Kennedy announces himself the winner The Great Khali walks down the ramp. Kennedy wisely high tails it, however, Scott is not so fortunate. Poor Gunner is double chokeslammed and then stuffed in a body bag by Davairi! The tiny manager challenges The Undertaker to a "Punjabi Prison Match" at The Great American Bash. Khali then drops to one knee and mocks the Taker's pose.
WINNER: Ken Kennedy
Match 5: Vito vs. Simon Dean
A skit is shown where Vito was shopping for dresses, while wearing a dress. Vito is flaunting his dress to Dean before attacking. Unfortunately Vito's dress rides up and he's wearing a nasty thong! Dean is wary on touching Vito, and the dress wearer takes advantage by smashing the nutrition freak. Vito slaps on a half nelson style submission and is victorious.
Match 6: Main Event- Steel Cage: Bobby Lashley vs. King Booker w/ Queen Sharmell
After back and forth battling, Lashley has gained momentum and is whipping his royal highness all over the steel cage. The U.S. champ barely holds onto Booker's foot and drags the king back into the ring. Lashley keeps stopping Booker's escape and the king continues to ground the big man's injured knee. Lashley delivers the running over the shoulder powerslam and tries climbing over the cage. Regal and Finlay are armed with chairs preventing his escape. Lashley then notices Booker is almost over the cage on the other side of the ring. The champ tosses Booker off the turnbuckle and is able climb over the top and to the floor while the outside official distracted Finlay and Regal.
WINNER: Bobby Lashley
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Andy McNamara is a freelance and SLAM! Wrestling writer. Andy asks: if you could add one Superstar to Smackdown who would it be and why? Contact Andy at firstname.lastname@example.org.