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Smackdown: JBL in a whole new Angle
By
DALE PLUMMER -- SLAM! Wrestling
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Despite my prognostications, Smackdown! survived
Armageddon. Come to think of it, isn't that Pay Per
View guilty of false advertising? I mean if it's
Armageddon, shouldn't the show cease to exist? Anyway
the aftermath of Sunday's show starts in Nashville,
Tennessee.
JBL and his cabinet kick off the show, again. The
champ rides out on top of his limo with balloons and
confetti raining from the roof. JBL comes himself a
conquering warrior, returning to Nashville, and then
comparing himself to Presidents Franklin D. Roosevelt
and Ronald Reagan. He then calls GM Theodore Long
corrupt and the fans ungrateful. JBL then takes a
shot at the Tennessee Titans, saying now the fans can
cheer for a winner. JBL, the greatest champ ever.
Kurt Angle takes exception to JBL's claims, and
confronts the champ with the rest of his team.
JBL tells Angle that he had better be here to
congratulate him. Angle instead disputes the champ's
claim. Angle refers to the match at Armageddon 2000,
where he beat five men in a Hell in the Cell match. He
points out JBL only beat three men in a normal match.
The champ points out that match was four years ago,
and on Sunday he lost a 3-on-1 match to Big Show.
Angle then challenges him for a match. JBL does think
that facing Angle is a good idea, just not tonight.
The champ has given himself the rest of the year off.
Oh yeah, and Angle calls JBL "bucko", so we'll be
hearing that chant for the next 11 months.
Theodore Long tells him not so fast. Only the GM
can say who has time off. He then makes the match for
tonight. Heel versus heel, hmmm ...
Match #1 - Rey Mysterio and RVD vs. Billy
Kidman and Akio
Mysterio and Kidman start things off. Kidman hits
a back breaker, and tags in Akio. Mysterio hits a
tilt-a-whirl head scissors, sending Akio into the
ropes. It's a little early for the 619; Akio ducks it.
Kidman grabs Rey from apron, but Mysterio ducks and
Akio takes out his partner. Mysterio hits a corkscrew
face buster, and is able to tag in RVD. Kidman tastes
rolling thunder, soon after Akio is knocked from the
apron. Kidman responds with the BK bomb, but is kicked
in the head by RVD, as he climbs the turnbuckle.
Mysterio hits a head scissors from the top, and RVD
finishes off Kidman with the five-star frog splash.
Winner via pin fall: Rey Mysterio and RVD
Things heat up as Torrie Wilson comes to the ring
in her patriotic gear. The Smackdown! Diva promotes
the show's trip to Iraq with a video of last year's
show. If you missed RAW on Monday Night, Mick Foley
announced he will be making the trip. Wo-Hoo!
As Michael Cole and Tazz finishes hyping next
week's show, Heidenreich emerges from the crowd.
Heidenreich grabs a chair and sits in the middle of
the ring. He starts reciting more poetry. Will someone
please tell this guy open mike night is Wednesday! In
short, despite getting it handed to him by Taker,
Heidenreich has cost him the title twice. In his
twisted mind that means he is winning.
Backstage, Eddie Guerrero and Booker T talk about
how they almost won the WWE Title. They agree that
they are on the same page, but next week Eddie has to
fly solo. Booker gets angry, and says this will be the
first Booker T-off. Eddie and Booker get in each other
faces, but then Books says he was just pushing his
buttons. That playful scamp!
Orlando Jordan tries to see Theodore Long, but
Michelle McCool shoots his request down, just like my
request to take her to dinner. Luther Reigns stops by,
and gets into an argument with Jordan. It's one of
those "My dad can beat your dad" arguments you got
into when you were five. Jordan mentions he has full
health care; this seems to shut Reigns up.
Match #2 - Renee Dupree and Kenzo Suzuki w/
Hiroko vs. Booker T and Eddie Guerrero
Booker T matches up with Dupree to start he match.
The Frenchmen elbows his way out of an arm bar, but
shoots off the ropes into a spin kick. Latino Heat
tags in, and continues to work over Dupree. Kenzo gets
the tag, but is beat down in the corner. Dupree tags
back in, hitting a backdrop, but then is hip tossed
out of the ring, as we go to commercial. After the
break, Eddie has Kenzo in the corner. Booker tags back
in, and he chops away at the bronze warrior. A bad
snap mare, takes down Booker, and Dupree tags in.
Booker sets up the axe kick, but is low bridged by
Kenzo, as he tries to shoot off the ropes. Book is
cornered in the heel corner, and then taken down with
a high elbow from Suzuki. Dupree tags in, and Booker
hits a flapjack. Both Guerrero and Kenzo tag in. Eddie
drops him with a drop kick, and then hits a vertical
suplex. Dupree almost gets a taste of the three
amigos, but Kenzo breaks it up. Booker hits the axe
kick on Dupree and Eddie finishes with the frog
splash.
Winner via pin fall: Booker T and Eddie
Guerrero
Orlando Jordan is apologizing to JBL because the
match is still on. The champ is happy, and asks if
anyone in his cabinet thinks he can beat Angle.
Everyone says he can. Amy Weber informs the champ that
he will be headlining next week's show from Iraq. JBL
doesn't seem thrilled. Caribbean Carlito Cool struts
into the locker room, and tells JBL they have a mutual
problem. Teddy Long is treating them both unfairly.
CCC says they need to talk after JBL retains his belt.
Carlito takes a bite off his apple, and just walks
away.
Are you kidding me!?! WWE is showing the
Cena-Jesus match from Armageddon. Well, I wrote about
it on Sunday, with Nick Tylwalk, and you can read all
about it in our Armageddon recap. But we got to see it
in all it's glorious, blood-drenched color.
The farce known as Tough Enough is finally coming
to an end. Al Snow calls out the two finalists Mike
Mizanin and Daniel Puder. In a shocker, Puder wins. I
say shocker, because the odds on favorite never wins.
Snow congratulates Puder and announces Puder will take
part in the Royal Rumble. The Miz has "backstage
announcer" written all over him -- someone get him in
touch with Josh Matthews.
Team Angle is getting ready backstage. Angle says
America needs a hero, a hero that they can respect.
Jindrak and Reigns tells Angle that they have his
back. Reigns then complains about back pain, Angle
tells him to be quiet so he can concentrate on his
upcoming match.
Teddy Long joins the boys at the announce table
with a major announcement. Next week, Heidenreich will
face the Undertaker in Iraq. He then offers some joy.
Joy Giovanni that is. She prances to ringside, tossing
candy canes to the crowd. Joy offers JBL a candy cane.
Amy isn't amused, and a catfight ensues. Clothes are
ripped off, you know the drill. Teddy Long stops the
madness, and bans all parties from ringside.
Match #3 - Kurt Angle vs. JBL - WWE
Championship Match
Angle starts off by working over the champ with
mat wrestling maneuvers. JBL regains his base, and
punches Angle into the corner. The Olympic champ hits
a belly-to-belly suplex. JBL responds with right
hands, and then a high elbow. The champ hits a suplex,
and follows with a sleeper hold. Angle powers his way
out, and is able to slap on the ankle lock. JBL breaks
the hold by grabbing the bottom rope. JBL rolls out of
the ring, Angle follows. The champ hits him with a
thumb to the eye, and then whips Angle into the steel
steps. We return from break to find Angle in a top
wristlock. Angle punches his way out, and then hits an
arm drag. JBL lands a shoulder and knocks Angle to the
mat, and then slaps on an arm bar. Angle counters a
JBL move with an inverted DDT, and both men are down.
Angle and JBL trade blows, but Angle is caught coming
off the ropes. JBL hits a fall away slam. The champ
signals for the Clothesline from Hell, but Angle
counters with a back body drop. He follows with the
triple German suplexes. Angle goes from the Angle
slam, but Bradshaw counters. Angle dodges a boot, and
slaps on the ankle lock. The champ eventually counters
the hold. JBL tries another big boot, and Angle
counters into an Angle slam. JBL kicks out after two.
Bradshaw sets up for power bomb, but Angle reverses
with a sunset flip into an ankle lock. Orlando Jordan
tries to break the hold, but Angle ducks him and
Jordan flies over the ropes. Jindrak and Reigns
intercept the Bashams, as JBL taps, but he ref doesn't
see it. Jordan finally breaks the hold with a belt
shot to Angle's skull. JBL goes for the cover, but
Angle kicks out. JBL gets caught in another ankle
lock, and Jordan breaks it again. This time the ref
sees it, and JBL is DQ'ed.
Winner via pin fall and new WWE Tag Team
Champions: RVD and Rey Mysterio
Big Show hits the ring, and cleans house. The
Bashams are hit with a double clothesline, and lays
out Jordan with a big boot. He then follows up with an
F-5 on JBL's chief of staff. Show then lets everyone
know, that he wants the title.
Visit the SLAM! Wrestling store!
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The Mouth of the South: The Jimmy Hart Story
Dale Plummer has been writing for SLAM!
Wrestling since 2003. Dale is wondering when his
tickets to Baghdad will be arriving from the SLAM!
offices, so he can cover Smackdown! in person. You can
send your donations to Dplummer627@yahoo.com
