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Smackdown: 'Taker taken down
By
DALE PLUMMER -- SLAM! Wrestling
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Armageddon is coming! And it's not that
impressive, yet. With the Pay-Per-View only 10 days
away, I'm sure some match will be added tonight, as
Smackdown comes to us from Richmond, Virginia.
Teddy Long intercepts JBL and his entourage
entering the arena. The GM tells them that they're
late, and his new "secretaries of defense", the
Bashams, will be taking on Booker T and Eddie
Guerrero. He also tells JBL that he will team with
Orlando Jordan to face the Undertaker in a handicapped
match.
Match #1 - Rey Mysterio, RVD, and Torrie
Wilson vs. Renee Dupree, Kenzo Suzuki, and Hiroko
Hiroko slaps Torrie before that bell, but the
faces and heels separate before anyone else can join
in. RVD and Dupree start off. Dupree stalls by bowing
to his corner. RVD shoots off the ropes and hits a
shoulder block. Dupree miss a leg drop, and both men
pop up and square off. RVD catapults Dupree over the
top rope. Mysterio tags in, and RVD and Rey taunt
Suzuki, who trips coming into the ring. Suzuki is then
tossed from the ring. Hiroko enters, and gives Rey and
head tap. Torrie then jumps her. Suzuki tries to break
up the catfight. Torrie knocks Hiroko into the ropes,
but Dupree cuts off the 619. Misterio hits a reversal,
and RVD climbs the top rope and hits the five star
frog splash on Dupree. Rey covers for the win.
Winner via pin fall: Rey Mysterio, RVD, and
Torrie Wilson
Al Snow brings out the Tough Enough boys, and I go
to the bathroom. Al asks Ryan Reeves if he wants to
quit, because of his broken ribs, and Reeves says he
will. Just kidding, he wants to stay. Then all are
asked who should be voted off. And then the fan vote
is announced. Ryan Reeves, hit the bricks, kid. Next
week, the two remaining contestants will take on each
other in a boxing match, but tonight they'll be
dressing up as women.
Hiroko is chewing out her man backstage. She's
jealous of Torrie Wilson, and Kenzo says she has
everything. Hiroko decides to challenge Torrie to a
Bra and Panties match next week.
Oh, I forgot to mention the Joy Giovanni is the
special timekeeper. At least she's collecting a
paycheck, as opposed to (insert cut wrestler here).
Match #2 - Charlie Haas w/ Miss Jackie vs.
Jesus w/ Carlito Caribbean Cool
Carlito grabs the mike, and complains the Haas is
hogging all the women. That's just not cool. He then
asks Miss Jackie when she is going to get with someone
cool. Haas grabs Carlito, and Jesus jumps him. Haas is
worked over on the ring post, as Miss Jackie pleads
for the carnage to stop. CCC then holds Haas as Jesus
hits him with Cena's chain. Multiple referees finally
stop the madness, as Miss Jackie consoles her man.
No Contest
WWE is going back to entertain the troops this
holiday season. I wonder if SLAM! will foot the bill
for me to go with? (Note to my editors: I already
know the answer to that question.)
Teddy Long chases down Carlito and Jesus in the
back. Long calls the pair a couple of thugs, and then
books Jesus in a street fight. The boys are expecting
to face Haas, but Long says Jesus will face John Cena.
It's Raw Rebound time. You can read Nick Tylwalk's
report here.
Booker T and Eddie Guerrero are stretching with
one of the Michelles. Booker and Eddie start arguing.
Eddie says that Booker has blown every chance he's
had. Michelle reminds the guys that they are tag team
partners, and the two pipe down.
Match #3 - Booker T and Eddie Guerrero vs. The
Basham Brothers
JBL and Orlando Jordan join Cole and Tazz at
ringside. Booker starts things off, trading blows with
Danny Basham. Booker knocks him down in the corner,
and starts stomping a mud hole in him. Danny is then
tossed from the ring. Eddie Guerrero knocks down a
Basham, as we come back from break. Eddie takes the
fight to the outside, only to get double teamed back
in the ring. JBL is a heel, we get it, WWE doesn't
have to ruin a good match by having him talk over it.
Booker T hits a single flapjack. Booker is able to tag
out, and Eddie takes it to Danny. Doug jumps in, but
Eddie is able to pull off the dual arm drag-head
scissors. Booker T jumps in, and sets Danny up for the
axe kick. Booker tries to shoot off the ropes, but is
accidentally low-bridged by his teammate. Eddie hits
the three amigos on Doug, but Booker jumps and starts
to argue with Eddie. Doug knocks Eddie into Booker,
and rolls up Eddie to score the win. JBL enters the
ring and hits the Clothesline from Hell on Eddie, and
then on Booker T.
Winner via pin fall: The Basham Brothers.
It's time for the Kurt Angle Invitational! Angle
comes to the ring with Luther Reigns, Mark Jindrak,
and a host of armed guards.
Match #4 - Kurt Angle vs. Sebastian from
Richmond
The over/under on this match is 30 seconds. Angle
offers his hand for a shake, and Angle cheap shots the
guy. Angle beats the tar out of the hometown boy, and
then hits the Angle slam. He immediately follows with
the ankle lock, and Sebastian taps. I hope you took
the under. Oh, and Angle actually wore his gold medal
from Atlanta, tonight, not the fake ones he usually
wears.
Winner via submission: Kurt Angle
Angle the grabs the stick, and asks Joy to come to
the ring. Angle wants her to come to the ring, because
she was embarrassed last week. Angle gives her his
word that nothing will happen. Luther apologizes for
embarrassing her last week. Reigns then gives us his
sob story about not having friends, family, etc.
Reigns offers to take her to dinner. Joy thanks him
for the apology, but says she already has plans with
Big Show. Angle restrains his boy. Angle can't believe
she turned down Luther for the Big Show. There's a
joke here, but I'll let everyone use his or her
imaginations. Luther asks her again, and Big Show
comes to the ring. Reigns pushes Show into the corner,
but he fights out and cleans house. Show hits a double
clothesline, and Angle pulls his boys from the ring.
Show grabs the mike and challenges all three to take
him right now. Angle accepts, but then stops short of
the ring. All three men head to the back.
Smackdown takes a look back at the trip to Iraq.
Tough Enough time. This segment is pointless,
unless you count Hardcore Holly getting seduced by all
three contestants. I guess he's still being punished
for the stunt pulled with Renee Dupree. Holly does
break character, though, and starts to crack up
laughing. I, on the other hand, feel nauseous. I will
admit that I was excited when Tough Enough was
returning, but a lot of things look good on paper,
like invading Russia in the winter. Mike Mizanin ends
up 'winning'. Hardcore Holly then punks Al Snow for
making him take part in this nonsense.
Dawn Marie is in the ring to show up Miss Jackie.
Dawn disrobes and asks the crowd who is sexier. Miss
Jackie storms the ring, and a catfight ensues. Refs
hit the ring to separate the two. Teddy Long comes out
to stop the madness. He tells the two that they will
face each other at Armageddon with Charlie Haas as the
guest referee.
Match #5 - JBL and Orlando Jordan w/ Amy Weber
vs. The Undertaker
Undertaker and Jordan start off the match. The
Dead Man dominates Jordan with a shoulder knock down.
Jordan kicks 'Taker, with no effect. Undertaker falls
to the outside. JBL stalks him, but Undertaker catches
him in the act, and whips him into the ring steps.
Jordan is tossed back into the ring. Taker goes old
school, clubbing Jordan to the mat. JBL hops in, but
Undertaker drops him on the turnbuckle. JBL retreats
into the corner, and then tosses Jordan onto the
champ. After the break, Undertaker continues to work
over Jordan. Jordan gets caught with a side slam, but
JBL makes the save to break up the pin. Undertaker
attacks JBL on the apron, and then hits a guillotine
leg drop. Undertaker takes out Jordan with a flying
forearm, and then sets up the last ride. JBL saves his
partner with a big boot, and then finally tags in.
Undertaker locks in a leg bar, and Jordan jumps in and
breaks the hold. Jordan tags back in, and tries to
work over the Dead man in the corner. Undertaker
fights out of a suplex, and hits a DDT coming off the
ropes. Both men are down, but Jordan is able to tag in
JBL. The champ is whipped into the corner, and bounces
into a big boot. Undertaker goes for a dual choke
slam, but is cut down by a low blow from JBL. The ref
calls for the bell.
Winner via DQ: The Undertaker
JBL and Jordan team up to beat on 'Taker. The Dead
Man hits a dual clothesline, and follows with a choke
slam for Jordan. The Bashams hit the ring, and are
disposed of. JBL nails a big boot, and then the
clothesline from hell. Undertaker sits up, as JBL is
tossed his title. The belt shot puts 'Taker down, and
the Bashams attack. Jordan joins in. JBL calls them
off, and taunts Undertaker as the show goes off the
air.
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Order DVD everyone is talking about -- The Rise and Fall of ECW
Dale Plummer has been writing for SLAM!
Wrestling since 2003. Dale is still sifting through
the extras on the Rise and Fall of ECW DVD. You can
expect a review in the coming days.
