Match #2: X-Division Championship Match: Michael Shane (with Tracy) VS. Christopher Daniels Shane (Shawn Michael's cousin) is the longest reigning X-Division Champion in TNA's brief history. That being said, I'm sure the guy who held that record before him (Chris Sabin) had twice as many title defences. In case you've never read one of my TNA recaps: I make no apologies for blatantly marking out for Daniels. He is the best wrestler on the planet. Daniels was wearing black tape as an armband in tribute to Jerry Tuite (Malice and The Wall before that) who died suddenly several days ago. Shane threw Daniels into the steel steps on the outside head first, but Daniels caught the corner and busted himself wide open. Blood was literally gushing from the Fallen Angel's head. Shane continued to work on Daniels making the wound worse. He jumped from the ring to the top rope and tried a moonsault but Daniels slid out of the way. He followed with consecutive dropkicks to the knee, a legwhip, enziguri and spinning toe hold. Shane stopped Daniels' momentum with an elbow to the head. Fisherman DDT by Shane! Wow. Daniels managed to get his foot on the ropes. Shane missed the Double Jump moonsault, but Tracy hit Daniels off the top by sitting on his face. Not a bad day at the office. Daniels with the AWESOME Nagata lock (stepover figure four) submission hold. Tracy interfered allowing the move to be broken. Daniels totally dominated, which forced Tracy to hand a chain to her man. Chris Sabin ran down and attacked Shane forcing him to drop the chain right before he clobbered the challenger. Daniels took the chain and used it on Shane. The ref saw it and disqualified the king. DAMMM! Winner and still champion: Michael Shane Backstage the 3 Live Kru were talking to Scott Hudson. Glen Gilberti and David Young walked in and tried negotiating a title match for Simon Diamond and Johnny Swinger. Swinger and Simon walked in and told Gilberti to shut up and stop speaking for them and to stop trying to handle their business. Match #3: NWA World Tag Team Title Match: 3 Live Kru VS. America's Most Wanted AMW are looking to become the first four time tag champions in the "modern-era of the NWA" (copyright Mike Tenay). They have fancy new ring gear. According to Canadian hip hop artist Dan-E-O, new gear for a championship match on a pay per view ALWAYS means title change. 3LK continues to be represented in the ring by B-Gizzle (BG James / Jesse James / The REAL Double J / The Road Dogg) and The Sun Tanned Superman (The Truth, K-Krush, K-Kwick, Ron Killings). K-Dizzle (K-Dawg / The Barbarian / Konnan / Max Moon / dude who sucks) stood at ringside modelling something horrific from the NBA's merchandise catalogue. Mike Tenay and Don West put James over as a great tag team wrestler, making reference to his 5 tag titles with Billy Gunn in the WWF. The match started slowly and featured a lot of offence from Killings. Simon and Swinger walked out to the ramp to scout the match. The action started to pick up, so Simon and Swinger went down to the ring to try and interfere. David Young stopped them just short of the ring and told them not to interfere. As they were arguing, Killings came off the top with a suicide dive taking everyone out. Only Chris Harris and James were left in the ring. There was a ref bump where James ALMOST made contact with the official. Spear and Sharpshooter by Harris. Gilberti in from behind with a chair shot on The Wildcat. Killings made the cover. Winners and still champions: 3LK Hudson was backstage asking JJ who his tag partner would be for the main event. He was upset and flustered by said he'd have a great partner. Callis yapped like a little rat that the champion didn't NEED a partner at all. Match #4: The Red Shirt Security Team VS. CM Punk and Julio Dinero If the bookers had ANY pity on the fans at all, they'd have Northcutt stand on the apron and let Legend and Punk carry the bout. No luck. Northcutt (the pride of so many nightclubs' front doors) started the match out with kicking and slapping and sucking. It's like a slimmer version of Albert without the piercings and back hair. Legend was tagged in to work Punk and used various high impact moves and submission holds. Northcutt was tagged back in and I went to make a sandwich. Legend tagged back and used a single arm halo into an arm rip. He then turned that into a type of top-wrist lock cobra clutch. Punk flipped Legend and made the hot tag to Julio. Punk took Legend over the top. Northcutt went for a powerbomb but it was reversed into a roll up by JD. Winners: Punk and Dinero Hudson asked Shane Douglas and his 'Franchise' stable (Michael Shane and Tracy) if they were on Jarrett's side or their own. Douglas said that their intentions would be made public at a future time. Douglas continued to cut a promo about how was going to be franchised. Match #5: Shane Douglas (with Tracy) VS. Chris Sabin Douglas with a big kiss and a dip for Tracy. Uh oh, wait till Sinn gets back! Sabin's music has been remixed. Same beat with "SA-BIN" being screamed over top. It's pretty awesome. I said earlier that Daniels was the best wrestler in the world. Sabin is number two. Blah, go ahead and email me Molinaro! Tell me about some dude who had a 9 star match at the Tokyo Dome last week. Sabin rocks. Case closed. Douglas with the front suplex followed by his trademark rolling snapmare / neckbreaker. Sabin made it back to his feet and took Douglas down with a Discus Chop! Wooooooo. After a few minutes, both men collided head first. Tracy walked up the stairs and waved that chain around again. Sabin got to his feer and kicked it out of her hands. A reverse spinning back heel kick took Douglas down. He then nailed Michael Shane who tried to interfere. Tracy ran into the ring and yelled at the former X Champ. Sabin then dropped out of the way as Douglas came running in, inadvertently taking out his girl. Small package by Chris. 1-2-3. HAIL SABIN. Winner: Chris Sabin Backstage D'Lo and AJ talked about how they have teamed together, fought each other but have maintained mutual respect all along. Match #6: Raven VS. Abyss (not accompanied by Don Callis for some reason) Raven sporting his black kilt again this week (does he know Hot Rod is in the building?) while Abyss still looks to be in desperate need of a makeover. The mask is cool (even if it is a little too 'Mankind'), but the torn denim shirt and tight Levis just don't scream "Monster". Abyss attacked and took a drop toe hold sending him to the outside. Raven followed but was whipped to the safety rail, actually breaking the connection between two gates. Abyss slammed Raven's head into the steps repeatedly. Abyss slammed the edge of chair into Raven's elbow and bicep over and over. The shots looked pretty stiff. Abyss then set a table up inside the ring against the turnbuckles. Raven tried to make a comeback and went for the discus punch / clothesline combo. Abyss caught Raven and put him up into a decent looking bear hug (take notes Mark Henry). Abyss tried to spear Raven in the corner, but put his own shoulder into the post instead. Raven comeback. You know the sequence: lefts, discus clothesline, bulldog, knee lifts. Abyss fought back and used this awesome move where he put Raven up in a Torture Rack backbreaker and then sat out! Raven kicked out. Legend ran down and distracted the ref while Abyss speared Raven into the table! The former ECW champion was bleeding from his back, but still kicked out. Raven his the Evenflow DDT out of nowhere but Legend pulled the ref out of the ring. As the ref was dealing with Legend, Kevin Northsuck ran in and put Raven down. Abyss sprawled an arm over his opponent but we had yet another kick out. Bear hug by Abyss. I was wrong, Abyss doesn't make the move look cool. All bear hugs should be banned. Smack to the ears by Raven followed by a Superkick. At that point Northcutt and Legend jumped Raven causing the ref to ring the bell and DISQUALIFY Abyss! I'm sorry. WHAT? DQ? After all the crap that went down? Interesting. Winner: Raven by DQ Punk and Dinero saved their former leader from being busted open for a record 900th consecutive day at work. Nice promo by Raven at the end. He's still standing Abyss. Raven said that next week he will team with the Gathering against those other three dudes in a cage match bloodbath. A 6 man cage match sounds like a shmozz to me - but I'll watch anyway. It's my job. Don Callis later said that the stipulation for that match would be that if Raven's team lost, his TNA dreams would be over. It was announced that next week Low Ki (YES YES YES!) will try to take the X title away from Michael Shane. Match #7: Main Event: D'Lo Brown and AJ Styles (with Roddy Piper) VS. Jeff Jarrett and a surprise partner (with Don Callis) Well no big bombshell was dropped. The surprise partner was Kid Kash doing double duty. To start the match, Kash attemped a spingboard somersault dropkick from the outside in, but was met by a double standing dropkick from D'Lo and AJ. D'Lo then backdropped his partner over the top rope onto Jarrett on the floor. D'Lo battled Jarrett on the outside while AJ and Kash exchanged shots in the ring. Styles tagged Brown in and right away seemed to have a three count! Either Kash forgot to kick out or the ref was counting too fast. Nice double team moves by D'Lo and Kash as the former ducked a clothesline and tossed his partner over his shoulders into a dropkick! D'Lo was being dismantled by Jarrett but hit a short powerbomb on a reversal. A luke warm tag to Styles, who came in and hit the best standing dropkick since Greg Gagne or Jim Brunzell. Jarrett bailed out bringing in Kash. Kash with the Dead Level (reverse vertical suplex into a dropping shoulder breaker across the knee). Styles was down which allowed JJ to tag back in and rip off Ric Flair and Jackie Fargo one more time. Is there anyone who looks goofier doing the strut than Jeff? D'Lo finally got back into the match and took out both men. He got caught by JJ went coming off the ropes though, and Kash went for his somersault Van Terminator. HORRIBLE camera angle over Brown's shoulder made it look as though Kash missed the move completely. Another huge production error came seconds later. Jarrett tried to get into the ring with a chair, but the ref stopped him. That's what the camera was watching when Piper hit Kash with his flag pole (we only caught the last second of that spot). Kash was going for a Hurricanrana off the top on AJ, but the interference sent the Kid backwards into a second rope Styles Clash! Roll up and win. Winners: AJ and D'Lo Jarrett lost it and throttled Callis, Kash and anyone else in sight. They eventually calmed him down, but then Eric Watts made his way into the crowd with a microphone and Goldylocks behind him. Watts talked about how next week he's going to hurt Triple J by forcing him to defend his title. Hey Jarrett: STOP INTERRUPING EVERYONE ELSE'S PROMO. Stand there - sell it and THEN throw your two cents in. All it does it get the guy talking flustered and off track and makes the whole damn thing sound like a pissing contest between a couple of punk high school kids. Anyhow, next week Jarrett will be forced to defend against Sting. Unless my math is wrong, this would be Sting's fourth and final TNA appearance (as per the initial contract he signed earlier this year) so expect another win for Triple J... but that's next week's recap. Till then... Donnie Abreu has been a wrestling journalist for eight years and is the co-founder of IceCold Media (www.icecoldmedia.com). Visit IceCold Media for all your custom media design needs. Mention that you read Donnie's column on SLAM! and receive a 20% discount! Looking to make some extra cash? Visit www.icecoldmedia.com to find out about ICM's new Affiliate Program and how it can work for you! " />

 

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   Thu, December 11, 2003



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TNA: It's all about Double J
By DONNIE ABREU -- SLAM! Wrestling


Christopher Daniels needs a medic after tangling with Michael Shane.

Winner: The Notorious K.I.D.

JJ then grabbed the mic and said he was serving notice to everyone in TNA: You will be buried if you don't like the fact that I'm the man. Actually, what he said was "You're either with me or against me". He pointed out that Kash made the decision to join him last week, and Harris (his friend of fifteen years) decided not to.

They went back to work on Harris but AJ Styles ran in with a chair and chased everyone to the outside. Suddenly, the Nashville Pipes and Drums (dudes in skirts who blew) marched out and played that old familiar tune. The lights went down and Roddy Piper walked through the Asylum and into the middle of the ring, waving an NWA flag.

Piper yelled and ranted about reclaiming NWA turf and protecting his "home". A sign was held up behind Hot Rod that said, "Smells Like WCW". Truer words may never have been written. That did get me thinking though; what would WCW have smelled like if it was in fact a smell? I'm thinking a wet dog- old milk n rotting fish hybrid.

JJ said that ever since Wrestlemania 1 Piper has been able to talk the talk but not walk the walk. There's a lot of truth to that statement too. JJ said he was taking Piper out immediately. He ran down with his entire posse, but Piper's surprise back up ran out. It was the returning D'Lo Brown. The weak part was Brown delivered one or two shots, but then stood back with Styles while Piper took out two men at once. Watts took the mic and referred to Jarrett several times as 'Triple J' (a nickname that was Jarrett was given by internet fans comparing JJ's stranglehold on the World Title and the creative process to that of Triple H in the WWE). Watts told Jarrett to find a partner because he would be facing the reunited team of Styles and Brown in this week's main event. Watts asked Piper if he wanted to be the special ringside enforcer. Piper shouted "This one's for you Hawk".

After twenty minutes of babbling and chirping, it's time for...

Match #2: X-Division Championship Match: Michael Shane (with Tracy) VS. Christopher Daniels

Shane (Shawn Michael's cousin) is the longest reigning X-Division Champion in TNA's brief history. That being said, I'm sure the guy who held that record before him (Chris Sabin) had twice as many title defences.

In case you've never read one of my TNA recaps: I make no apologies for blatantly marking out for Daniels. He is the best wrestler on the planet. Daniels was wearing black tape as an armband in tribute to Jerry Tuite (Malice and The Wall before that) who died suddenly several days ago. Shane threw Daniels into the steel steps on the outside head first, but Daniels caught the corner and busted himself wide open. Blood was literally gushing from the Fallen Angel's head. Shane continued to work on Daniels making the wound worse. He jumped from the ring to the top rope and tried a moonsault but Daniels slid out of the way. He followed with consecutive dropkicks to the knee, a legwhip, enziguri and spinning toe hold. Shane stopped Daniels' momentum with an elbow to the head.

Fisherman DDT by Shane! Wow. Daniels managed to get his foot on the ropes. Shane missed the Double Jump moonsault, but Tracy hit Daniels off the top by sitting on his face. Not a bad day at the office. Daniels with the AWESOME Nagata lock (stepover figure four) submission hold. Tracy interfered allowing the move to be broken. Daniels totally dominated, which forced Tracy to hand a chain to her man. Chris Sabin ran down and attacked Shane forcing him to drop the chain right before he clobbered the challenger. Daniels took the chain and used it on Shane. The ref saw it and disqualified the king. DAMMM!

Winner and still champion: Michael Shane

Backstage the 3 Live Kru were talking to Scott Hudson. Glen Gilberti and David Young walked in and tried negotiating a title match for Simon Diamond and Johnny Swinger. Swinger and Simon walked in and told Gilberti to shut up and stop speaking for them and to stop trying to handle their business.

Match #3: NWA World Tag Team Title Match: 3 Live Kru VS. America's Most Wanted

AMW are looking to become the first four time tag champions in the "modern-era of the NWA" (copyright Mike Tenay). They have fancy new ring gear. According to Canadian hip hop artist Dan-E-O, new gear for a championship match on a pay per view ALWAYS means title change. 3LK continues to be represented in the ring by B-Gizzle (BG James / Jesse James / The REAL Double J / The Road Dogg) and The Sun Tanned Superman (The Truth, K-Krush, K-Kwick, Ron Killings). K-Dizzle (K-Dawg / The Barbarian / Konnan / Max Moon / dude who sucks) stood at ringside modelling something horrific from the NBA's merchandise catalogue. Mike Tenay and Don West put James over as a great tag team wrestler, making reference to his 5 tag titles with Billy Gunn in the WWF. The match started slowly and featured a lot of offence from Killings. Simon and Swinger walked out to the ramp to scout the match. The action started to pick up, so Simon and Swinger went down to the ring to try and interfere. David Young stopped them just short of the ring and told them not to interfere. As they were arguing, Killings came off the top with a suicide dive taking everyone out. Only Chris Harris and James were left in the ring. There was a ref bump where James ALMOST made contact with the official. Spear and Sharpshooter by Harris. Gilberti in from behind with a chair shot on The Wildcat. Killings made the cover.

Winners and still champions: 3LK

Hudson was backstage asking JJ who his tag partner would be for the main event. He was upset and flustered by said he'd have a great partner. Callis yapped like a little rat that the champion didn't NEED a partner at all.

Match #4: The Red Shirt Security Team VS. CM Punk and Julio Dinero

If the bookers had ANY pity on the fans at all, they'd have Northcutt stand on the apron and let Legend and Punk carry the bout. No luck. Northcutt (the pride of so many nightclubs' front doors) started the match out with kicking and slapping and sucking. It's like a slimmer version of Albert without the piercings and back hair.

Legend was tagged in to work Punk and used various high impact moves and submission holds. Northcutt was tagged back in and I went to make a sandwich. Legend tagged back and used a single arm halo into an arm rip. He then turned that into a type of top-wrist lock cobra clutch. Punk flipped Legend and made the hot tag to Julio. Punk took Legend over the top. Northcutt went for a powerbomb but it was reversed into a roll up by JD.

Winners: Punk and Dinero

Hudson asked Shane Douglas and his 'Franchise' stable (Michael Shane and Tracy) if they were on Jarrett's side or their own. Douglas said that their intentions would be made public at a future time. Douglas continued to cut a promo about how was going to be franchised.

Match #5: Shane Douglas (with Tracy) VS. Chris Sabin

Douglas with a big kiss and a dip for Tracy. Uh oh, wait till Sinn gets back! Sabin's music has been remixed. Same beat with "SA-BIN" being screamed over top. It's pretty awesome. I said earlier that Daniels was the best wrestler in the world. Sabin is number two. Blah, go ahead and email me Molinaro! Tell me about some dude who had a 9 star match at the Tokyo Dome last week. Sabin rocks. Case closed. Douglas with the front suplex followed by his trademark rolling snapmare / neckbreaker. Sabin made it back to his feet and took Douglas down with a Discus Chop! Wooooooo. After a few minutes, both men collided head first. Tracy walked up the stairs and waved that chain around again. Sabin got to his feer and kicked it out of her hands. A reverse spinning back heel kick took Douglas down. He then nailed Michael Shane who tried to interfere. Tracy ran into the ring and yelled at the former X Champ. Sabin then dropped out of the way as Douglas came running in, inadvertently taking out his girl. Small package by Chris. 1-2-3. HAIL SABIN.

Winner: Chris Sabin

Backstage D'Lo and AJ talked about how they have teamed together, fought each other but have maintained mutual respect all along.

Match #6: Raven VS. Abyss (not accompanied by Don Callis for some reason)

Raven sporting his black kilt again this week (does he know Hot Rod is in the building?) while Abyss still looks to be in desperate need of a makeover. The mask is cool (even if it is a little too 'Mankind'), but the torn denim shirt and tight Levis just don't scream "Monster".

Abyss attacked and took a drop toe hold sending him to the outside. Raven followed but was whipped to the safety rail, actually breaking the connection between two gates. Abyss slammed Raven's head into the steps repeatedly. Abyss slammed the edge of chair into Raven's elbow and bicep over and over. The shots looked pretty stiff. Abyss then set a table up inside the ring against the turnbuckles. Raven tried to make a comeback and went for the discus punch / clothesline combo. Abyss caught Raven and put him up into a decent looking bear hug (take notes Mark Henry). Abyss tried to spear Raven in the corner, but put his own shoulder into the post instead. Raven comeback.

You know the sequence: lefts, discus clothesline, bulldog, knee lifts. Abyss fought back and used this awesome move where he put Raven up in a Torture Rack backbreaker and then sat out! Raven kicked out. Legend ran down and distracted the ref while Abyss speared Raven into the table! The former ECW champion was bleeding from his back, but still kicked out.

Raven his the Evenflow DDT out of nowhere but Legend pulled the ref out of the ring. As the ref was dealing with Legend, Kevin Northsuck ran in and put Raven down. Abyss sprawled an arm over his opponent but we had yet another kick out.

Bear hug by Abyss. I was wrong, Abyss doesn't make the move look cool. All bear hugs should be banned. Smack to the ears by Raven followed by a Superkick. At that point Northcutt and Legend jumped Raven causing the ref to ring the bell and DISQUALIFY Abyss! I'm sorry. WHAT? DQ? After all the crap that went down? Interesting. Winner: Raven by DQ

Punk and Dinero saved their former leader from being busted open for a record 900th consecutive day at work. Nice promo by Raven at the end. He's still standing Abyss. Raven said that next week he will team with the Gathering against those other three dudes in a cage match bloodbath. A 6 man cage match sounds like a shmozz to me - but I'll watch anyway. It's my job. Don Callis later said that the stipulation for that match would be that if Raven's team lost, his TNA dreams would be over.

It was announced that next week Low Ki (YES YES YES!) will try to take the X title away from Michael Shane.

Match #7: Main Event: D'Lo Brown and AJ Styles (with Roddy Piper) VS. Jeff Jarrett and a surprise partner (with Don Callis)

Well no big bombshell was dropped. The surprise partner was Kid Kash doing double duty.

To start the match, Kash attemped a spingboard somersault dropkick from the outside in, but was met by a double standing dropkick from D'Lo and AJ. D'Lo then backdropped his partner over the top rope onto Jarrett on the floor. D'Lo battled Jarrett on the outside while AJ and Kash exchanged shots in the ring. Styles tagged Brown in and right away seemed to have a three count! Either Kash forgot to kick out or the ref was counting too fast. Nice double team moves by D'Lo and Kash as the former ducked a clothesline and tossed his partner over his shoulders into a dropkick!

D'Lo was being dismantled by Jarrett but hit a short powerbomb on a reversal. A luke warm tag to Styles, who came in and hit the best standing dropkick since Greg Gagne or Jim Brunzell.

Jarrett bailed out bringing in Kash. Kash with the Dead Level (reverse vertical suplex into a dropping shoulder breaker across the knee). Styles was down which allowed JJ to tag back in and rip off Ric Flair and Jackie Fargo one more time. Is there anyone who looks goofier doing the strut than Jeff?

D'Lo finally got back into the match and took out both men. He got caught by JJ went coming off the ropes though, and Kash went for his somersault Van Terminator. HORRIBLE camera angle over Brown's shoulder made it look as though Kash missed the move completely.

Another huge production error came seconds later. Jarrett tried to get into the ring with a chair, but the ref stopped him. That's what the camera was watching when Piper hit Kash with his flag pole (we only caught the last second of that spot). Kash was going for a Hurricanrana off the top on AJ, but the interference sent the Kid backwards into a second rope Styles Clash! Roll up and win.

Winners: AJ and D'Lo

Jarrett lost it and throttled Callis, Kash and anyone else in sight. They eventually calmed him down, but then Eric Watts made his way into the crowd with a microphone and Goldylocks behind him.

Watts talked about how next week he's going to hurt Triple J by forcing him to defend his title. Hey Jarrett: STOP INTERRUPING EVERYONE ELSE'S PROMO. Stand there - sell it and THEN throw your two cents in. All it does it get the guy talking flustered and off track and makes the whole damn thing sound like a pissing contest between a couple of punk high school kids.

Anyhow, next week Jarrett will be forced to defend against Sting. Unless my math is wrong, this would be Sting's fourth and final TNA appearance (as per the initial contract he signed earlier this year) so expect another win for Triple J... but that's next week's recap.

Till then...

Donnie Abreu has been a wrestling journalist for eight years and is the co-founder of IceCold Media (www.icecoldmedia.com). Visit IceCold Media for all your custom media design needs. Mention that you read Donnie's column on SLAM! and receive a 20% discount! Looking to make some extra cash? Visit www.icecoldmedia.com to find out about ICM's new Affiliate Program and how it can work for you!