Smackdown: Lesnar's bad, A-Train's worse
DALE PLUMMER -- SLAM! Wrestling
The electricity is on and flowing here in Pennsylvania's capitol of
Harrisburg, so those of you that are in the dark, tonight, I'll shed
some light on Smackdown! It's only 10 days until Summer Slam as we join
Michael Cole and Tazz in St. Louis.
Vince McMahon kicks the show off. I wonder what's on his mind,
tonight? He is going to introduce us to someone tonight. It's someone we
thought we knew, but we really don't know him. It's "The Real Brock
Lesnar." He is a sadistic animal according to Vince. For those of you
who didn't watch last week, Lesnar's heel turn is recapped, and Vince
loves every second of it. Vince then tells Kurt Angle, who is recovering
back home -- he will face the music next week.
Speaking of music, Lesnar's hits and the "Manster" makes his way to
the ring. Lesnar explains his actions last week. He tells us that Kurt
was his friend, up until he won the WWE Title at Vengeance. Vince jumps
in and announces that Angle will defend his belt at Summer Slam against
Lesnar. General Manager Stephanie McMahon crashed the party. She stands
up to her father. Telling Vince she won't quit, and that he'll have to
fire her. She goes on to say that he is garbage as a father and husband.
Vince retorts by calling his daughter a disappointment, and the worst
investment he's made since marrying his wife. Steph tries to slap her
dad, but Lesnar grabs her arm. Vince retaliates by booking his daughter
in a match with A-train.
Match #1 - Rey Misterio and Billy Kidman vs. The Self-Processed
World's Greatest Tag Team - WWE Tag Team Championship match
Kidman, fresh off his honeymoon, and Charlie Haas start things off.
A leg scissors takes Haas down, but the Seton Hall grad recovers and
fights Kidman into the corner, where he is double-teamed. Kidman fights
it off, and Benjiman tags in. Kidman, selling the leg work, is able to
tag in Misterio. Benjiman catches Misterio in mid-air, but Misterio is
able to counter with a modified DDT. Benjiman isn't down long, and
almost picks up the win with a T-bone suplex. Kidman breaks up the
pinfall, to save the match. Kidman then hits a cross body block over the
top rope to floor on Haas. Benjiman falls to a spinning hurricarana off
the top rope, but is able to kick out. After a commercial break, that
gives me a chance to check out some pre-season football, the action is
fast and furious. Haas breaks up a 619 attempt, by back dropping
Misterio over the top rope. Haas the tags in, as Misterio make his way
back into the ring. Haas and Benjiman double-team the cruiserweight
champ, dropping him across Haas's knee. Benjiman then locks in a bear
hug. Haas and Benjiman continue to double-team Misterio, who cannot get
to his corner for a tag. When Kidman finally gets the tag, he comes in
and cleans house. Haas and Kidman go to the top rope, where Misterio
jumps in and powerbombs Haas to the mat. Kidman hits the Shooting Star
Press as Misterio hits a 619 on Benjiman. Kidman only gets a two count.
Misterio grabs his title belt on the outside, but the ref sees him. What
the ref doesn't see is Benjiman nailing Kidman with the ring bell. Haas
covers Kidman and gets the victory.
Winners via pin-fall and still WWE Tag Team Champions: The
Self-Processed World's Greatest Tag Team
Match #2 - Danny Basham w/ Doug Basham and Shanequa vs. Billy
Gunn w/ Torrie Wilson
Gunn dominates this match early. Danny Basham can't get any offense
in. Shanequa attacks Torrie and throws her into the ring. This provides
enough distraction for Doug to jump in and help his brother take out
Gunn. The ref doesn't see a thing, and Danny picks up the win.
Winner via pin-fall: Danny Basham
After the match, the Basham beat down Gunn even more, but then turn
their attention on Torrie. Torrie is huddle in the corner, and Shanequa
grabs her by the hair. She proceeds to body slam her in the middle of
the ring. Jamie Noble and Nidia run to the aid of their new "friends."
But the trailer-park couple is over powered by the Bashams. Noble is
laid out by a spinebuster from the second rope, and Nidia is powerbombed
The APA is watching in the back. Bradshaw is convinced that Shanequa
is really Sheldon Benjiman in drag. They two then discuss re-opening the
business. We never do get an answer, though.
The Big Show is seen leaving Vince McMahon's office.
Match #3- The Big Show vs. The Undertaker
Undertaker still isn't fully healed from his battle with John Cena.
The Dead Man walks into a choke slam, but reverses it into an arm bar,
that has The Big Show writhing in pain. 'Taker then takes Show down with
a DDT, and drags him to the ring apron, where he drops a leg across the
giant. Undertaker is in control after going Old School. Big Show regains
momentum with a side slam. Show then nails Taker with a clothesline and
starts stomping on the injured ribs. Undertaker ducks a big boot and
Show gets caught up on the ropes. Big Show is then knocked to the floor.
Big Show recovers and rams Undertaker into the steel steps. Undertaker
reverses an Irish Whip and Big Show is rammed into the ring post. The
fight spills over the security barrier, into the crowd. Undertaker is in
control, until A-Train comes through the crowd and nail Undertaker with
a 2x4. The ref starts the ten count. Big Show is able to get back in the
ring, and Undertaker is counted out.
Winner via count out: The Big Show
During the break, Undertaker, in obvious pain, is seen receiving
Match #4- Rhyno vs. Tajiri
Eddie Guerrero rolls out in a low-rider truck, and joins Cole and
Tazz at ringside. Chris Benoit follows, also joining in at the announce
table. Tajiri picks up the win after dodging a Gore, which sent Rhyno
into an exposed turnbuckle. A kick to head from Tajiri finished off the
Winner via pinfall: Tajiri
Guerrero takes off after the match with Benoit in hot pursuit.
Benoit wants a ride in the truck. They both get in and Benoit annoys the
hell out of Guerrero, until Latino Heat just gets out of the truck and
Match #5 - Zach Gowan vs. John Cena
John Cena has his own shirt! I know what I'm buying at the next live
event I see! Cena insults Zach by, GASP!, making fun of his missing leg.
Cena uses his "Ground and Pound" attack effectively to keep Gowan down.
He sets Gowan up for the F-U, but just drops him. Cena decides to hit
the F-U off the top turnbuckle. He sets up the move, but Gowan counters
on the way down with an armbar. The one-legged wonder hits a springboard
leg lariat, followed by a bulldog. Gowan tries a cross body block, but
Cena rolls through it. He picks up Gowan and finally hits the F-U for
Winner via pin-fall: John Cena
Steph is backstage getting ready and she looks terrified. She then
runs into her opponent, A-Train. The hairy one tells her that he was
paid to take her out at Vengeance, but he would have done it for free.
He also informs Steph that he like it rough, and she should too.
After the commercial, we see footage of Matt Hardy punking Zach
Gowan after his match with Cena.
In the catering area, Spanky, Funaki, and Orlando Jordan are hanging
out. Spanky impresses the two by chugging two bottles of chocolate
syrup. In his zeal, he accidentally sprays Vince McMahon. Bad move.
Vince is more then angry. He calls Spanky a stain on life, like the
stains on his jacket. Spanky then makes fun of Vince's investment in the
XFL. That pushes Vince too far and he orders Spanky to the ring, to face
Match #6 - Spanky vs. Brock Lesnar
Lesnar destroys Spanky. After three powerbombs, Lesnar grabs a steel
chair. Lesnar chases the ref after one vicious shot to the kid. The ref
eventually disqualifies Lesnar, but that doesn't stop him. He bust
Spanky wide open with more chair shots, and it doesn't stop there.
Lesnar picks up the poor kid and throws him into the ring post from five
feet away. It was brutal. Vince then comes out and celebrates with his
Backstage, Steph looks like she's gonna cry.
Match #7 - Stephanie McMahon vs. A-Train
Vince sticks around to see this in person. First he announces a
special ring announcer, Sable. Sable announces Steph as whom she beat at
Vengeance, and that the match is now a no-count out affair. Steph gets
to the ring and jumps Sable for some good, old-fashioned catfight
action. The A-Train's music hits, and Steph freezes. A-Train tosses the
GM across the ring, after she slaps him. Dead man walking! Undertaker
tries to make things right. A-Train runs out to meet him and is met with
a chair shot. 'Taker is taking it to A-Train, when Big Show lays out the
Dead Man from behind. A-Train heads back to the ring to finish the job.
He drags Steph into the corner and hits a splash form the middle
turnbuckle. He pins her for the win.
Winner via pin-fall: A-Train
After the match Vince and Sable enter the ring. With Steph writhing
in pain, Vince and Sable kiss in the middle of the ring.
Dale Plummer is a rookie on the SLAM! Wrestling staff. Dale can't
wait to get his hands on Cena's new shirt, if anyone wants to buy it for
him please drop him an email
for contact information.