May 15, 2003
TNA: S.E.X. rules
By DONNIE ABREU - SLAM! Wrestling
This week\'s show was geared towards settling some old scores and tying up some loose ends. We had a couple of grudge matches, a ton of mistakes and a few memorable moments.
A limo pulled up and out walked the #1 contender (that\'s still difficult to say) Glen Gilbeti.
\"The Gift\" pulled out a wad of bills and tipped his limo driver pretty nicely. He\'s wearing a dark designer suit and said It\'s nice that there is a camera there to greet the next NWA champion. He tells the cameraman to follow him for the rest of the night. .
S.E.X. is in the ring when Sonny Siaki takes the mic and introduces Gilberti as the next NWA champion.
Gilberti walks down and takes the stick. He talks about how he beat up on Jeff Jarrett last week and won the Anarchy in the Asylum match.
Gilberti says that fans have to admit two things: that he does what he says he\'s going to do, and that he\'s got a fine suit on! Mike Sanders jumps in and asks if that\'s the $3,500 dollar suit. Gilberti says he wouldn\'t waste that on Nashville - and this week he\'s only sporting his $2,500 threads.
Gilberti then tells everyone in the back that if they aren\'t with S.E.X. then they are against them. Everyone must either join, or be tossed out of the company. He claims to have made a hit list of NWA stars they will be going after systematically.
The Extreme Revolution comes out to challenge Gilberti\'s authority. New Jack did all the talking and just rambled about how they were going to take S.E.X. down. A mini brawl started and Team Extreme cleared the ring.
Mike Tenay and Don West introduced the show. They promote an X-Division title match where the Amazing Red will put his belt on the line for the first time against Chris Sabin. NWA TNA Tag team champions Triple X will defend against the undefeated team of D\'Lo Brown and A.J. Styles in the main event.
Goldylocks is interviewing Chris Sabin. Sabin says he may be the underdog but he has been waiting for this shot for a long time, and he\'s going to make the most of it. Jerry Lynn interrupted and informed Sabin that he petitioned the TNA office and the title match will be a three way dance!
Chris Sabin VS. Jerry Lynn VS. The Amazing Red : X-Division Title Match
The match went back and forth with all men holding brief advantages until all three members of Triple X came down to ringside.
Interesting rest spot when Lynn had a figure-four head scissor on Sabin and Red had one on Lynn.
Amazing Red had his flying shoes on this week - hitting most of his signature moves with a little bit of extra spring in his step. .
Sabin did hit Red with the \"Future Shock\" (fisherman brain buster), but the count was stopped by Lynn. Lynn then hit a cradle piledriver on Sabin but Red broke that up.
The referee was distracted by Low Ki when Elix Skipper knocked Red off the top rope. Skipper then hit the Play Of The Day and then pulled Sabin on top for the win.
WINNER: Chris \"The Future\" Sabin
After the match Triple X took the title from Sabin and handed him an S.E.X. t-shirt. Sabin put the shirt on, took his belt back and joined Sports Entertainment Xtreme.
In the S.E.X. locker room, Gilberti congratulates Sabin. He then tells Sanders to take out Mike Awesome, and for the Harris twins to go looking for Sabu.
Kid Kash came into the S.E.X. locker room and wanted to make sure he wasn\'t on their \'hit list\'. In order to protect himself, he offered Gilberti the services of his contracted valet, Trinity.
Mike Sanders VS. Mike Awesome: Table Match
This match has been brewing for a couple weeks, and was set up by Sanders eliminating Awesome from last week\'s AIA match.
In a match of Mike versus another Mike, confused colour commentator Don West repeatedly referred to each by their first name. Very frustrating. Someone please sell this man a clue.
There were tables set up all around the ring. The match was slow and difficult to watch. After a few minutes, S.E.X. interfered and took out Mike Awesome. Awesome was saved by his fellow New Church members, Slash and Brian Lee.
Sanders eventually put the former ECW Champ through a table for a very anti-climatic win.
WINNER: Mike Sanders
Ron Killings VS. Kid Kash
Konnan came out with his boy Killings to do color commentary.
Konnan talked about when Gilberti was a member of the Filthy Animals in WCW (remember that?) and how he wasn\'t a tough guy, and spent all his time with a duck.
The match was technically decent, but surprisingly seemed to have very little heat. Both men have been heels recently and the crowd didn\'t know who they were supposed to cheer for. Even the heel section seemed confused!
As Kash went for his somersault Van-Terminator, the Harris twins showed up and attacked Konnan. They kicked a chair into his face and laid him out his closed fists.
In the ring, Killings had recovered and gave Kash a Scott Hall style fallaway slam from the second rope. He then went to the top rope and dove onto the Harris\'. Awkward moment, because it looked like the Harris\'s were supposed to catch Killings, but instead they tripped and fell.
The mystery luchador (obviously Trinity) gave Kash and inverted DDT. Killings crawled back into the ring and made the cover.
WINNER: Ron Killings
The mystery luchador (obviously Trinity) gave Kash and inverted DDT. Killings Sandman went to the parking lot to meet with Gilberti, but instead Siaki was there. They talked for a few minutes before going at it and brawling all the way down to the ring. The fight exploded into a ring full referees, security, S.E.X. and Extreme Revolution members. This was a major waste of time.
Saturn then challenged Gilberti to a one on one match. Gilberti came from the back and said he would change into his gear and then beat Saturn\'s ass.
There was a video package featuring Jeff Jarrett. He talked about the strained ligaments in his knee and his hip pointer injuries.
Jeff talked about how the WWE has suffered since they purchased WCW. He says Vince McMahon sat back since he didn\'t have anyone pushing him. He says TNA is the alternative for wrestling fans. \"You don\'t have to sit through a bunch of filler to get the pay off once a month\".
He then compared the transformation of Disco Inferno into Glen Gilberti to Stunning Steve Austin becoming Stone Cold and Mean Mark Callus becoming The Undertaker.
Kid Kash is backstage trashing his locker room. Tracey jumps in and says last week he dropped her on her head and she liked it! She said she likes it rough and she wants to be with him. She offers him a massage and reaches into her pants after pouring lotion on her hand! Kash then doubles over in pain and gets slapped to the ground by Tracey. It seems she rubbed Icy-Hot all over him. Ouch! .
Chris Harris VS. David Young
This match started slowly with very little fan interest. David Young has less personality than a bucket of paint.
Harris held Young up for a long, long time in a vertical suplex. Eat your heart out Tony Halme. Sonny Siaki was standing ringside and gave Harris a very sarcastic thumbs up.
Harris fell to the outside when Siaki pulled the ropes down with the Wildcat on the run. At that point, Young came to the outside and gained his first notable advantage of the match.
Young hit a springboard moonsault of the second rope to the outside. Very well done. Definitely not something you would expect to see from the very stocky Young.
Funny moment when Young had Harris in a side head lock, Siaki was screaming for the time keeper to ring the bell, saying it was all over!
Young showed off a nice move, throwing Harris into the air and catching him with a Diamond Cutter.
Harris recovered and took his opponent out with a Goldberg-ian spear. The referee went to check on Young, when Siaki entered the ring and took Harris out with the Siakalypse.
Harris\' partner \"Cowboy\" James Storm then showed up and eliminated Siaki. They brawled down the aisle and to the front door of the S.E.X. locker room. That\'s when Storm was attacked by the Harris twins and dragged into their office.
Back in the ring, Harris finally won the match with the Catatonic. I may be wrong, but I\'m pretty sure this was the first singles win for Chris Harris.
WINNER: \"The Wildcat\" Chris Harris
Harris ran to the S.E.X. locker room when he saw Storm get thrown out. The Cowboy was wearing a crimson mask.
Gilberti is backstage telling Julio Dinero and Alexis Laree they have to make a decision because Raven will soon be out of the picture in TNA. He says the reason they haven\'t heard from their leader is because Raven doesn\'t care about anyone but himself.
He tells the Gathering to be in his corner for his match, and prove that they can become members of S.E.X.
\"Gifted\" Glen Gilberti VS. Perry Saturn
Early in the match Tenay announces that Chris Harris has taken his tag partner out of the building to seek medical attention.
There was a terrible spot in this match. Saturn had Gilberti straddling the top rope when he did a Jericho style springboard and tried to hit Glen with \"something\". Saturn got tangled in the rope and his opponent. They both tumbled to the floor in a very sloppy looking mess. Guess what the crowd was chanting. It was sort of like \'You Messed Up!\'
Later in the match, Saturn went for a DVD but was interrupted by Julio Dinero. Saturn took and Dinero and then Laree giving Gilberti time to rest. Gilberti got to his feet and hit a weak looking Diamond Cutter. Saturn kicked out couldn\'t do it again when he took that move a second time a few moments later. This was a terrible match.
WINNER: Glen Gilberti
Backstage with A.J. Styles and D\'Lo Brown. They say they aren\'t going to leave TNA no matter what S.E.X. says. Styles says he didn\'t turn down a WWE contract just to leave TNA. Styles didn\'t mention it was a developmental contract with a very low downside guarantee.
A.J. Styles and D\'Lo Brown VS. Triple X : NWA TNA Tag Team Title Match
Defending the titles for Triple X this week will be \"The Fallen Angel\" Christopher Daniels and \"Prime Time\" Elix Skipper. Low Ki was on the outside.
Brown and Styles are really starting to act like a team; A.J.\'s purple trunks matched D\'Lo\'s kneepads perfectly! Now that\'s unity.
Elix Skipper was awesome. He walked the ropes (Undertaker style - but without being held up by anyone) and snapped off a perfect hurricanrana. He then went to the edge of the ring apron and spring-boarded himself back in with a corkscrew plancha.
Daniels, who has shown many unique submissions in TNA, pulled out a combination hammerlock / abdominal stretch. He then locked Brown down with the Koji Clutch.
A.J. Styles stood with his back to his opponent and did a standing reverse 360 bicycle kick that saw him land on his feet. It looked like something out of the Matrix - Reloaded. Unbelievable. Styles is one of those RARE wrestlers who will literally show you something new every time you see him! He reminds me so much of Rob Van Damn early in his TV title days in ECW.
Low Ki was comforting Daniels on the outside but Brown threw his partner into them on the outside. Then D\'Lo went to the top rope and landed on Triple X.
The end came when A.J. was trying to connect with the Styles Clash. Glen Gilberti interfered and gave Styles a Stone Cold Stunner. Daniels rolled up the first X-Division champion and scored a pinfall.
WINNERS AND STILL CHAMPIONS: Triple X
After the match Triple X beat on their opponents some more, while the rest of S.E.X. went into the NWA locker room and wiped out everyone back there. Gilberti was heard repeatedly saying \"I\'m the king of the world\" while chomping on a victory cigar.
No Raven, no Sabu, no Eric Watts (other than a brief cameo at the start of the show), no Dusty Rhodes, no Jeff Jarrett (other than his pre-taped segment).
This was definitely not the best show TNA has ever done and may have been the weakest since early March.
Donnie Abreu has been a wrestling journalist for eight years and is the co-founder of IceCold Media (http://www.icecoldmedia.com). Visit IceCold Media for all your custom media design needs. Mention that you read Donnie\'s column on SLAM! and receive a 20% discount!