It’s too easy ... really far too easy.
But a good hitter never passes up on a fat one and rarely has one this juicy been served up.
FIFA president Sepp Blatter gave yet another state of the union address at the FIFA congress in Sao Paulo.
Blatter and his organization are being walloped from all sides as continued discoveries have been made about vote-buying in the bidding process that awarded the 2022 World Cup to Qatar.
Yet instead of attempting to address certain issues, Blatter the Oblivious went off on another tangent with his comments.
Here’s the pitch:
“We shall wonder if one day our game is played on another planet. Why not? Then we will have not only a World Cup we will have interplanetary competitions,” he said.
And here’s the swing:
Presumably it will be held on whatever planet Blatter is from.
Going, going, going, gone . . .
No doubt if it was ever to happen, Blatter would be Jabba the Hutt, sitting on his interplanetary throne on Tatooine collecting tributes and coin along with his group of sycophants who keep him in power.
Then, as if acting crazy isn’t enough, Blatter proceeds to speak as if he’s the one to ensure FIFA is going in the right direction in the future.
“Our world is changing, our game is changing. Our organization must also change. It is our duty to keep football going forward,” he said. “It is our duty to lead by example and behave like an example, with integrity.”
No direct mention of the ongoing controversy or what FIFA is doing to investigate it.
Where is Luke Skywalker when you need him?
This is just the latest in a long list of embarrassments Blatter has caused the soccer world. It’s no longer amusing.
Blatter has been the driving force behind the selections of the last four World Cups, in many ways pet projects of his regardless of the sanity of supporting the locations.
No one is looking forward to Russia in 2018 or Qatar in 2022. Brazil has had six years to be ready and is still desperately ill-prepared.
The good thing about all of this is that it won’t end well for Blatter.
In recent days major sponsors like Sony, Adidas, Coca-Cola have publicly indicated their displeasure at having their company associated with the actions of FIFA members.
Former English Football Association chair David Triesman has been after FIFA for years.
“FIFA, I’m afraid, behaves like a mafia family,” Triesman said. “It has a decades-long tradition of bribes, bungs and corruption.”
It is no longer possible to simply ignore the obvious and carry on because the business of soccer is being hurt as much as its reputation.
Blatter promised if he was elected for this term, he wouldn’t run again. Of course, he was just trolling for votes because now he’s going to run for another.
Blatter’s power base is in Asia and Africa, not surprisingly where he has promised -- and has brought -- World Cups.
How easy it is for a man to win support, and no doubt Jabba the Hutt-type bounty, when he promises to bring events to nations that don’t have the financial base to put on a proper show without going bankrupt.
The attraction of having something that other nations have is like putting candy in front of a kid that never has any. It’s difficult to show restraint and rationality.
Why are there protests in Brazil, a country where soccer is part of life itself?
Other than stadiums, where has $11 billion gone? $11 billion that the country didn’t have in the treasury to spend in the first place?
FIFA needs to stage the World Cup in countries that can afford to hold the tournament because they have the money and much of the infrastructure already in place.
But before sensibility arrives what must come is an enema that will give a good flush to the Blatter.
Mexico 2, Cameroon 0: Neither team is particularly good but Cameroon not into it after staging mini-strike of bonus payments.
Chile 3, Australia 0: The Aussies aren’t bad defensively but Chile has too much offensive talent for Australia to contain.
Spain 1, Netherlands 0: Spain will possess the ball and not give the Dutch many chances. Plus, Van Persie has yet to show he can score in big international games.