BRUCE GARRIOCH: First of all, let me say what a great honour it is to be joined by such esteemed company on The Digital Faceoff. The Three Stooges -- Chris Stevenson, Don Brennan and Tim Baines -- are all away and left me all by myself. I thought about talking to myself for 1,000 words, but I do that all the time and wanted some company.
BRENT WALLACE: Why do you think your fellow Sun colleagues left you all alone like McCauley Calkin?
ROY MLAKAR: My pleasure to join this esteemed group. Heard from down south at all? Is Mr. Baines having lunch with his idols, Dick "The Bulldog" Brower and Jimmy "SuperFly" Snuka?
GARRIOCH: I think he was helping Brennan buy some new suits. Brian Kilrea is sick of the brown one he always wears.
MLAKAR: That's funny, he never wears suits to Senators games. It's always the same army jacket and running shoes.
WALLACE: Bruce, c'mon, you know Doni only buys the "free" ones! And now that Baines is being fanned and fed grapes by Chris and Don, can we get on to talking some real sports in this section for a change?
GARRIOCH: All right, enough of the stupidity. Let's discuss whether the Senators can make the playoffs or not?
WALLACE: In a word: No.
GARRIOCH: Thanks, Brent. That's full of insight.
MLAKAR: I believe the players have taken the attitude of "one game at a time." Every night they seem to be having more fun with each win. I think they like the talk about being underdogs and have rallied to the "challenge" of the moment, rather than saying, "Yes, we are still in it." Good attitude from my perspective.
WALLACE: That's all well and good, Roy, but the reality is there are too many teams in front of Ottawa. Just one of those teams has to play even with the Sens down the stretch and end Ottawa's pipe dream.
GARRIOCH: Glad we invited Wallace, eh, Roy? Nice guy. I think they can do it, but it will take a lot of luck and hard work. Plus, they've got to run the table. A tall task, but I'm not nearly as negative as Wallace.
WALLACE: I'm sorry for being the voice of reason, guys. I'll change my mind -- Ottawa will win the Cup.
MLAKAR: YES, Brent thinks he can hide because he is that "TV Guy." Hey "Neiler," you read this Bozo's comments about us?"
WALLACE: Hey Bainsey, er, Roy ... I'm glad we've gone down the name-calling road already.
MLAKAR: READ my comments, Brent, this is all positive for the team. They are relishing the challenge. It's you guys who are looking at the end of the tunnel. I respect the way the captain (Daniel Alfredsson), in particular, has handled the pressure of all the playoff questions every night.
GARRIOCH: It's remarkable the change this club has made under coach Cory Clouston. The style has completely changed. At least you guys have a chance now. The last 10 games can show some promise of being exciting. I think that's good for the guy who has to sell tickets!
WALLACE: That's not my point. This isn't about how well this team is playing, this is about whether this team makes it into the playoffs. The answer is no. I'm glad Cory Clouston and his staff have found a way to turn the season of misery around. It looks good for next year.
MLAKAR: The fans here have been sensational (no pun intended) and they have taken this franchise over the last decade to being one of the top in the NHL. We get great support here.
GARRIOCH: Hey RAM, meet us in the back of the schoolyard at recess. This isn't about the fans. Look, this run is suddenly exciting. That's what this is about. Your best players are stepping up to be best players again.
MLAKAR: Wow, why did I join you two clowns? You don't want to give credit where credit is due. After losing more at home than any time over the last 12 years or so, I am just saying the fans never quit on the team. That helps their performance, too!
WALLACE: Actually, Bruce, it's not just the best players. They are being supported by the unsung heroes. Guys like Ryan Shannon and Nick Foligno and Chris Neil are all thriving under Clouston.
GARRIOCH: Brent, we can't let him keep calling us clowns. That's not nice. The media gives this team a lot of credit -- especially when you win.
MLAKAR: Actually, "Microphone Breath," it's everybody. As Bryan Murray has said: It starts at the top and for whatever reasons they have all bought into Cory's system.
GARRIOCH: We all agree on that fact. This team is playing way better under Clouston. They are more offensive and moving the puck better. They are also getting big saves. They need more performances like the one they got from Alex Auld Sunday in New York.
WALLACE: Isn't this the point where someone references a movie like Slap Shot or something only a certain sports editor would have seen when he was 12? I thought we were discussing the Sens making the post-season? Alex Trebek, how about getting this train back on the track.
GARRIOCH: I'd be remiss if I didn't ask you guys your favourite cartoon to finish this off.
MLAKAR: I am not sure, I have enjoyed this! BUT Smile and Wave Boys, Smile and Wave.
WALLACE: My favourite cartoon is the Sun sports section with Baines, Stevenson, Brennan and Garrioch on the digital roundtable. By the way, Roy, can we be Facebook friends?
MLAKAR: Sure, Brent, isn't that what Steve "Smokey" Keogh does all day now, since he left us for "The Big Smoke?"
WALLACE: For the record, Bruce is less clown, and more Humpty Dumpty.
GARRIOCH: Hey, that hurts. Thanks, boys. Have a nice day. See you in the playoffs.
MLAKAR: Thanks, Bruce, you and I will be there. Too bad Brent will miss them. Get your ducats now!
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