Blink vows TD drought at an end

It's not quite on par with Joe Namath's guaranteed victory in Super Bowl III, but for the Winnipeg Blue Bombers, it's bold enough. Going into tomorrow's Labour Day Classic in Saskatchewan, running back Charles Roberts is making a promise on behalf of his beleaguered teammates on the Bomber offence.

"We're going to score a touchdown," Roberts said. "I'm going to score two or three of them, personally."

See what we mean about bold?

The last time the Bombers managed an offensive touchdown, Perdita Felicien was still an Olympic gold-medal favourite, for crying out loud.

It was Aug. 12, here at the Stadium, when receiver Derrick Smith beat half the Edmonton secondary to put six points on the board in the second quarter.

Since then, this team's skill players have become champion abstainers, going more than 10 quarters, or 150-plus minutes, without. That's not an easy thing to do in the CFL.

Think of a soccer team not scoring for a year. Or Wilt Chamberlain, even.

After a while, it's hard to remember what it feels like.

"I don't," confessed Roberts, who hasn't scored a rushing touchdown since July 8. "I would love that feeling back, man. Because I started out hot. But the main thing is to get a win. And if that means we score seven field goals or Keith (Stokes) scoring a touchdown on special teams, the main thing is to get a win."

Fair enough, but you don't usually get them with a pop-gun offence.

Aside from offensive lineman Jermese Jones' fumble recovery, the Bombers haven't scored a touchdown along the ground in six games.

It's not quite as bad -- a two-game drought -- through the air.

But it's bad enough that Milt Stegall has just one major all year, back on July 16.

This is the same guy who used to score touchdowns in his sleep, including a CFL record 23 two years ago.

"Crazy," is how Stegall describes the Bombers two-game lapse. "Even when Kerwin Bell was quarterbacking it didn't happen."

Yikes, that's putting some perspective on it.

"That's very rare that's going to happen in the CFL, period," Stegall continued. "I don't care how bad a team you are. That says how much of a slump we're in."

All this would lead us to believe the Bomber defence will have to carry the day, if this team is to improve on its 3-7 record against the 4-6 'Riders.

"We don't look at it like that," said receiver-turned-defensive-back Markus Howell. "We're paid to stop the other team from scoring. If we've got to hold the score to 3-0, that's our job."

Before you go thinking Howell was exaggerating, remember: the Bombers had one yard net offence in the first half against Montreal. They did more backing up than a politician on the hot seat.

This team should come with a sign: Warning -- Offence Makes Frequent Stops.

Ever wonder how all that goes over on the defensive side of things?

"You can't be upset," linebacker Moe Kelly explained. "Because we played Edmonton and gave up 500 and some yards passing. So you can't get mad at anybody. You're not going to always have your best day."

Good point.

It wasn't long ago this defence was leaking oil all over the place, and it seems they got that job off the hoist and out the door.

Offence is a different beast, though, a mixture of brain, brawn and ballet, all working in unison.

"I consider us a Lamborghini," Stegall said. "One of the fastest cars on the road, but all it takes is a spark plug and we're stuck. And that's what's going on with us right now... there's always something little that's not working. And it's been going on for 10 games. Hopefully we got the right mechanic this week."

Mechanic?

How about a shrink?