The 2005 Grey Cup is hardly what you would call an awe-inspiring matchup.
It's hard to get too jacked up about a game which features the same two teams battling it out for the third time in four years. Yawn.
We've seen this picture before and we were never fans of Don Matthews movies in the first place.
The Don has rubbed so many people the wrong way that scribes in Montreal are calling for him to be fired, win or lose tomorrow.
Meanwhile, the last thing anybody really wants to see is an Eskimos win, after which the country will be subjected to barf-inducing crowing about another chapter being added to the City-of-Champions legend.
If Edmonton is victorious there will be so many big heads in Northern Alberta, they'll all have to wear Jason Maas helmets (with extra ear space).
On top of the fact that both teams are inherently dislikable -- at least to people in these parts -- neither was really that good this year. The Alouettes finished second in the East, the Eskimos third in the West.
The Als lost to the Winnipeg Blue Bombers, for the love of Kevin Glenn. They gave up 51 points. The Eskimos should have lost to the Bombers. They scored only 14 points against the worst defence in CFL history.
In our minds, the only bigger bust than this matchup is on the grand marshall of the Grey Cup parade (in case you didn't know, it's Pamela Anderson).
PIVOTAL DECISION: The reason we knew after Week 4 of the CFL season that Jim Daley was not long for the world as Blue Bombers head coach came in his own words: "Changing the quarterback does nothing to improve the offence." I guess it would really be kicking a guy when he's down to bring up the name Jason Maas right now, wouldn't it? ... Fans recently voted on the 10 greatest plays in Grey Cup history, settling on Gizmo Williams' 115-yard missed field goal return in 1987 as No. 1. However, in balloting which was no doubt conducted somewhere between Manitoba and Alberta, Dave Ridgway's 35-yard field goal to win the 1989 classic was picked second. A 35-yard field goal? Hell, Paul McCallum could have made that even if he slipped in (manure) on his way to the ball. Ridgway's field goal wasn't even the greatest play in that game, as anyone who remembers Tony Champion's game-tying touchdown catch can attest ... Roy Shivers has owned the Bombers this year. His 'Riders beat the Blue and Gold three times and the GM played his Winnipeg counterpart like a fiddle last week, dangling Danny Barrett in front of Brendan Taman's nose and then snatching the tempting offer away. But really folks, does anybody really want to see the Bombers loading up on Roughriders rejects in 2006? The Winnipeg Stampeders of 2005 were bad enough ... The Buffalo Bills are reportedly souring on offensive co-ordinator Tom Clements. Now there's a name we'd like to see added to the Blue Bombers' list of candidates.
BUNCH OF DOPES: Executives in the NHL continue to say the league doesn't have a problem with performance-enhancing drugs (ever hear of Sudies, fellas?) even though people like anti-doping czar Dick Pound beg to differ. Our question is this: if the NHL hasn't been conducting routine drug testing until this year, how would they know? ... Mario Lemieux was bang on when he suggested that even he should not be guaranteed a spot on Team Canada for the Olympics. Guys like Lemieux, Steve Yzerman and Todd Bertuzzi, who were once considered locks are going to have to beat out the likes of Sidney Crosby, Eric Staal and Jason Spezza fair and square ... Finally, Philadelphia Phillies relief pitcher Ugueth Urbina is accused of trying to machete-hack and set fire to some workers on his ranch in Venezuela. We're pretty sure that's not what scouts meant when they described him as a flamethrower with a nasty splitter.