The end is nigh and most, if not all, of us are going to die.
At least that’s the message Forrest Griffin wishes to get across in his new book, “Be Ready When the Sh*t Goes Down: A Survival Guide to the Apocalypse.”
“It’s a feeling I think we all have that it’s got to come to an end,” Griffin (17-6) said in an interview with QMI Agency. “You know, the hamster’s only going to run for so long. There’s only so much stuff. There are too many people using too much stuff.
“There will be some end to us. Who knows what it’s going to be, but it’s going to end. My hope is just that it will be in our lifetime.”
Though the former UFC light-heavyweight champion admits to looking forward to a post-apocalyptic world, he isn’t leaving his readers high and dry. The guide, which is co-written by Erich Krauss and features a section on transforming a vehicle into a “Deathcore Warmachine” penned by Ozzy Osbourne guitarist Zakk Wylde, offers useful tips on how to keep living if you survive the initial impact.
“(The goal is) self-sufficiency,” Griffin said. “I’m going to go live with the Amish. Don’t worry about me. I’ll be out there with the Amish.
“I’m going bicycle, brother. Don’t have anything you can’t fix or can’t acquire parts for easily. I don’t know much about cars. I have a couple cars I can fix, older cars. Obviously, Zakk Wylde knows a lot more about auto-mechanics and vehicles than I do.”
So if Griffin is so sure extinction is right around the corner, how will it go down?
The Ultimate Fighter season one winner outlines a number of possibilities in the book – including giant comets, viruses, super volcanoes and nuclear warfare – but Griffin feels a depletion of resources will lead to fighting that will cause most of us to perish.
“There are too many people, and in the housing market we’re currently experiencing a correction,” Griffin started. “Some things become bloated – people’s environment can’t sustain them. Well, there are too many people. The planet can’t sustain us. We have to have one of those corrections.
“The ship’s going down, buddy. When things become tough – and they will – we won’t have enough and our lifestyles are infringed upon, people will get crazy and we’ll start wars. We’ll start fighting over resources and most of us will die.
“But if you read my book, you’ll probably still die.”
If you’ve just envisioned a “Road Warrior” type world where roving gangs battle for oil, you’re not alone. In fact, Griffin’s fingers are crossed that’s exactly what it will be like.
“I’m hoping that’s going to be life – (‘Road Warrior’ will be) the movie of life,” Griffin said. “I can’t wait. I got some spandex, some leather and leotards.”
Though he covers a wide variety of post-apocalyptic scenarios, Griffin admits he missed one crucial topic.
“I was actually going to write something about zombies, but there is actually so much literature on zombies,” Griffin said. “That’s the biggest question I get, so obviously I should have covered that.
“I think there will be zombies -- hear me out. When there becomes a lack of antibiotics for common diseases like syphilis, it will make people crazy. And when they get the lesions on the brain and there are no antibiotics to cure them, there will be crazy, penisless syphilis-zombies running around very angry because their penises are falling off.”
As for Griffin’s fighting career, he expects to return from his shoulder injury by the end of the year.
“Goal: to win a fight by the end of the year,” Griffin said. “Not just return, but win a damn fight by the end of this year.
“I do not care (who I fight). I don’t want to know because they’re probably training hard to beat me up and I’m floating around, taking care of business. Like, doing life-type stuff.”
Watch the uncensored interview here